How To Help Your Child Navigate Their First Period with Confidence

Preparing your child for their first period—and roughly 40 more years of menstruation that follow—can feel like a big responsibility. But this milestone doesn't have to be overwhelming or awkward. In fact, with a little preparation and a lot of empathy, it can become a meaningful moment that strengthens your connection and boosts your child's confidence.

Periods are a normal part of puberty, yet many kids still face them with confusion, embarrassment, or fear. That's why it's so important for parents to lead with openness, honesty, and positivity.

1. Check Your Own Opinion About Periods

"In the history of talking about periods there are all sorts of words like 'curse' and 'suck,'" says Julie Metzger, RN, MN, co-founder of Great Conversations, an organization based in the Pacific Northwest that offers classes on puberty, sexual reproduction, and sexuality for parents and preteens.

Even if that's how you've come to think about Aunt Flo, Metzger recommends pausing to reflect. "Check in with that storytelling," she says. Your child is listening and the narrative you share matters.

Instead, consider the fact that you can communicate a different kind of story about what it means to grow up, experiencing normal and healthy body changes. Plus, even if your history with periods has been less-than-ideal, it doesn't mean your child's will be.

2. De-Mystify the Physical Details

"There's this real perception that life is limited by having a period," says Cara Natterson, MD, pediatrician and author of The Care and Keeping of You series. "Emphasize that this is not a disease: 'Don't think this is a window each month when you're going to be sick.' The biggest message about having your period is you can do almost everything you can do on a day you don't have your period. To empower [children] in that way is really important."

One of the most common concerns young people have about getting their first period is how much blood to expect. For instance, they might imagine there's free-flowing blood gushing out of their bodies. Dr. Natterson recommends helping them visualize the reality, which is far less dramatic than they may imagine.

"I explain that your uterus is about the size of your closed fist, and the lining of your uterus is just the inside of that fist. When you get your period over the course of several days, that lining of old blood and tissue slowly comes out of your body. Usually it's only about three tablespoons of blood total. When you show them in a cup what three tablespoons is, they realize it's not a lot," explains Dr. Natterson.

3. Explore Period Supplies Together

Metzger says she can't imagine buying a single thing without taking her daughter with her. So next time you visit the store, try taking a look at pads, tampons, period panties together. "Explain how there are several options for protecting her clothes when she gets her period—even some you haven't tried yourself—and ask if she wants to go look at some together," explains Metzger.

For kids who resist talking about it, Metzger suggests another approach: "You can say, 'I know it's hard for you to connect about this, so just so you know, I got some supplies and they're in the downstairs bathroom. I'd love to talk them over if you need, but feel free to go through it so you know what's there.'"

4. Be Hands-On with How to Use The Supplies

Young people might be intimidated by period supplies, Dr. Natterson says. "Pads come with the fear of not working or leaking, or just, 'Is it gross?' Tampons might be scary [because they involve] inserting something into their bodies." So it's important to teach your child how to use period supplies, when to change them, and how to implement best practices for optimal hygiene while doing so.

It's best to start with something simple that your child can easily put on and remove alone if needed—like a sanitary pad or period panties. Show them exactly how to use the item by modeling it in a private space. Instruct them on how to change it and when and make sure they know to wash their hands before and after application.

If you're child shows interest in trying tampons, you can show them how to safely insert one. "I always want kids to read something before they put a tampon in, whether it's the package insert in the box or a guide in a book," Dr. Natterson says. Whether you want to be in the room or not as your child learns how to use a tampon is up to you and them.

5. Empower Them to Handle the Logistics

"Describing what a period is takes me three minutes, but describing the logistics of a period—how to manage it, how not to be surprised by it, how to use tampons or pads, what to do if you start in school, what to do if you're a swimmer, how to build a pad out of toilet paper when you don't have any supplies—that can take two hours," Metzger says.

"Leaks are the number one question in the classes I teach," Dr. Natterson says. "The biggest lesson is be prepared for the mishaps. When you're younger, periods take you by surprise." To help prepare for every situation, menstruating people can keep a little pouch in their backpack with a clean pair of underwear, a couple extra pads, and a pair of pants as an emergency kit.

Kids "should be given permission to never have to worry about how they're going to manage their periods," adds Dr. Natterson.

You can also empower your child to take control of their health by tracking their period. This way, they can learn when to anticipate their period (even though it may be irregular at first). It also helps them recognize any issues or concerning symptoms.

"Also, explain that it's really hard to ignore the physical sensations of moisture that go along with having a period for long enough that you're going to be sitting in a puddle of blood in a chair," Dr. Natterson says. "When we're talking about leaking, we're talking about a small amount. That's a big relief, because they imagine it very differently than what we mean."

6. Avoid Focusing on Negative Symptoms They May Not Even Have

"Don't jump in there with a laundry list of things that some people find uncomfortable," Dr. Natterson says. That's an easy way to scare a child who is experiencing their very first period. "On the other hand, cramps, bloating, breast tenderness, and mood swings are real."

Your best bet is to just address these issues as they come up. If your child has just gotten their period and is suffering from a stomachache, ask, "Are you feeling queasy?' You might be having cramps. Is this how it feels?" According to Dr. Natterson, "Address it in context, put names to symptoms, and offer the tools to deal with them."

7. Get Any Men in Your Life Involved in the Conversation

"There are so many ways all parents can participate," Metzger says. "Even if they've never had a period, they've done almost everything else on the puberty list—gotten taller, put on weight, had pimples, grown new hair, had B.O., experienced being viewed differently or being embarrassed by the changes," Metzger says. Plus, it's important for children to feel comfortable telling any parent that they forgot tampons without feeling embarrassed.

And don't forget to talk about periods with your non-menstruating children as well. "To change the world, let's about periods in a way that normalizes them," Metzger says.

8. Teach Our Children to Have Each Other's Backs

Teach children that they're on the same team and it's important to watch out for one another, Dr. Natterson says. "They're going to experience periods and they're going to have mishaps and leakage. If you see it in someone else, have their back, even someone who's not a good friend," says Dr. Natterson.

For instance, if your child notices one of their classmates had an accident, Dr. Natterson recommends telling them to say, "Hey, follow me to the bathroom," or hand them a sweatshirt and tell them to tie it around their waist. Tell your child you to do something they would want someone to do for them.

9. Remind Your Child That Other People Have Periods, Too

It may sound obvious, but sometimes normalizing periods can go a really long way. Remind your child that many people experience periods and are OK. "Olympic athletes have periods," Metzger says. So do astronauts, pop stars, authors, teachers, friends, and relatives.

"Being a part of that story makes you a human being—and that's cool," says Metzger.