Most working parents realize that a stay-at-home partner is doing just as much work as they are, albeit in a domestic (as opposed to office) environment. But once in a while, misunderstandings and resentment between the two are bound to pop up. And that's exactly what went down in blogger Constance Hall's friend's home recently. As Hall shared in a now-viral Facebook post from September 27, "On Friday a friend called me really upset, her husband called her from work and told her he was going away on a spontaneous boys weekend that weekend. She asked me, 'Is it ok that I'm so mad? Would you be upset?'"
Hall told her Facebook followers that she thought about her friend's Q "from both sides." Her conclusion: The truth is that yes, I would be upset."
The Australia-based author went on to explain that "what those who don't stay at home with their kids don't realize is that women (or mn) who stays at home makes huge sacrifices, they don't love every minute of the relentless house work, going to the park alone with just our kids is not a 'blessing' ... it's hard f***ing work and no matter how hard they work, the same amount of work is presented to them the following day."
Ultimately, the only break SAHMs and SAHDs get... their "weekend, so to speak" is when their partner comes home, Hall elaborates. To parents who work outside of the home, she says, "You are the weekend, you are the break. Just knowing that you're not going to be the only one getting food down the kids throats or not the only one to buckle in and buckle out every kid. Makes it so much easier. The kids are happier because you are home, the women (or man) you love is happier because you are home. How crazy is that?"
Directly addressing dads who work outside of the home, Hall writes, "So the next time you want to spontaneously go away on a boys weekend and I'm not saying never have spontaneity, but I want you to understand why your partner may feel let down. Imagine if you worked 5 days and just before you clocked off you're partner called you and said 'by the way you don't get a weekend this week, you're working all the way through.' You'd be kinda pissed too. And at the end of the day, if somebody actually wants you home with them? Then you are already winning at life."
Cheers to that! Clearly, Hall's thoughts resonated with parents all over the world, as her post has racked up over 5,000 comments, more than 5,800 shares, and 57,000 reactions and counting.
While one commenter lamented, "The s***ty reality is that (most) women don't get to just have the luxury of a spontaneous weekend away...," another said, "As the bloke in this relationship, I couldn't agree more this is very well written and sooo true. I must be different but my son is two today! And to be honest there is nowhere I would rather be on my time off than with my beautiful wife and son. Picnics and park date are much more appealing to me than a boys weekend!"
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Perhaps Hall's post will stir up even more conversation around this contentious topic—and hopefully, ultimately get more couples on the same page.