I'm just gonna go ahead and admit this right up front: I'm one of those moms who lets the four-letter words fly in front of her kids with abandon. I know, I know. SO not cool. But I don't plan to do it, you guys. The swear words just always seem to roll right out when, say, I step on a Lego barefoot or another mom cuts me off in the school carline because she doesn't want to be late for yoga.
You know that happens, right?
Anyway, before you judge me, know this: Swearing in front of the kiddos goes down way more often then you'd think. In fact, according to the good people behind Kraft Macaroni & Cheese, 74 percent of moms have apparently copped to doing it. So in honor of Mother's Day, the company has decided to honor all of us perfectly imperfect potty-mouthed mamas with a new campaign called Swear Like a Mother. And they've tapped author and "swearing expert" Melissa Mohr, Ph.D., to give us some kid-friendly alterna-swears we can later bust out in the heat of the moment.
"If you're one of the 26 percent of the moms who say they've never sworn in front of their kids, you're full of sh*t," Dr. Mohr begins, before launching into her list of expletive replacements that includes things like the "What the frog?" "Son of a motherless goat," and—our hands down fave—"Get off your monkey-flunking tablet and get your shiitake mushrooms ready for soccer practice."
I am SO using that one tonight!
"No parent is perfect, but sometimes you can do better," Dr. Mohr explains at the end of the spot. "Other times you can't, and that's why there's Kraft Mac & Cheese."
A free pass to drop the occasional f-bomb and serve a dinner made from powdered cheese? Frog yeah, sign me up!