Are you the "mom type"? What does that even mean?!
That's the question blogger Gylisa Jayne wrote about in a recent Facebook post that has now gone viral with more than 3,000 likes and almost 200 comments at time of writing. In it, the mother of one from Cornwall, U.K., explains that because of her pink hair and tattoos she doesn't look like the stereotypical mother. But then again, people's expectations of who a mom "should be" are ridiculous.
"Motherhood isn't an exclusive club that you can only get into if you look or act the right way," she wrote. "It's full of women that all have lives and tales and colourful histories. Women of every type, from every background and every descent. Women that swear, women that don't, women that are real, and women that don't give a fuck about what you think."
Whether we fit the "type" or not, we've all felt pressure to be "perfect" moms, selflessly putting our kids first and sacrificing our needs and wants. It can feel like people expect moms to stop being the person they are once they start parenting a child—and that is crazy.
"Mothers are meant to sacrifice every aspect of themselves, to fulfill their role," Gylisa Jayne wrote. "Mothers aren't allowed expensive bags, or shopping trips out, or to have a fresh manicure every few weeks. Mothers aren't meant to have tattoos, or coloured hair or piercings. Mothers aren't supposed to have histories of being reckless, feckless or just plain fun. Mothers aren't meant to have had a colourful life of experiences before they bear children, they are expected to forget their identity to raise someone else. But how can we raise our children effectively if we haven't experienced a bit of life beforehand?"
Jayne thinks the response her Facebook post has received has "been fab.I didn't realise how many 'alternative' mothers there were out there, but at one point I was getting so many messages from ladies showing me their hair, or their tattoos and telling me that they felt judged before, but now I'd spoken about it they realised they are still absolutely the best mother for their kids," she told Parents.com. "I feel like I have a whole Pink Army of ladies that are sticking it to the stereotype by embracing their uniqueness!"
Jayne concluded her Facebook post with the only thing that really matters: "I might not fit someone else's expectations of how I should be, but my daughter reckons I'm doing a pretty good job."