Mom's Viral Post Asks Us to Stop Assuming Violent Kids Come from Violent Homes
"Some of us just got a weird one," she says.
The Australian mom who called out how ridiculous parenting double standards are, and who recently explained why she forbids her daughter from watching The Bachelor is back with another life lesson, that quite frankly, many of us may need to be reminded of.
Uber-popular blogger Constance Hall takes on another touchy subject in this viral Facebook post, which warns parents that when it comes to violent kids, things aren't always what they seem.
"Sometimes we see violent kids cruising around, kicking other kids, a sneaky punch, a subtle trip over, or looking like an outright steroid driven raging wrestler," she begins her powerful post, which has garnered more than 20,000 reactions so far. Hall continues, "Be it that the majority of us aren't inclined to hate on a kid, I also hear the concerned mums saying comments like 'poor kid, obviously sees a lot of violence at home.'"
Hall surmises that some moms may feel better assigning a reason to the behavior they fear. At least their child would never act like that! But this mama-of-four goes on to admit that she herself has a violent child, "Rumi is a f-ing little monster," she writes. "Today I turned my back for a split second and he had backed Snow into a corner and was kicking and hitting her with meth head force." Hall adds about her son, "He lashes out, it's just who he is."
The mom goes on to assure readers that her house may be messy, and the rules may be lax. "But one thing it is not is violent," Hall writes. She goes on to say that her other three kids are gentle.
"So please don't jump to conclusions that a child's behaviour is a reflection of a parents abilities to care for them," Hall insists. "Some of us just got a weird one." She also urges parents to not punish their kids with violence, but rather to make sure they get, "Extra snuggles, extra kindness and extra kisses and with a bit of love you won't have a psychopath on your hands."
Most of the comments to Hall's post are supportive, with many parents admitting they too have violent kids, in spite of their positive parenting techniques. I'll agree that you can do your very best job as a parent and still have a child who acts out. Consider too that Hall's son is just a toddler, and most of them are, ahem, challenging, to say the least.
The best we can do is teach our kids by example. But control their every impulse and mood? Hall isn't the only parent who hasn't figured that part out!
What's your take?
Melissa Willets is a writer/blogger and a mom. Follow her on Twitter (@Spitupnsuburbs), where she chronicles her love of exercising and drinking coffee, but never simultaneously.