Oeser, the mom behind the recent, epic Facebook post featuring instructions to her husband during her moms' weekend away, uses the chalkboards kids are often photographed with on their first days of school as inspiration. Except her sign says she loves "pooping alone." When she grows up she wants to "learn how to 'adult.'" Oh, and this mom of six has to work on "cooking, cleaning, and laundry."
Meanwhile, Oeser's age is listed as 36.9 years old, and she weighs 115 pounds...according to her driver's license (in 2006). Did I mention this awesome mama is drinking rum straight from the bottle, out of a straw?
Oh her blog, where the photo was originally posted, Oeser writes, "What kind of pure demon a**hole celebrates having to put their tiny human angel faces on a bus?"
"I get it," she continues. "Some of you work full time. Some stay home. Some work part-time. Some live in a van down by the river. I'm not here to judge, and neither should you. This is the card I was dealt. A mother f*cking ACE OF SPADES!!! I'm a SAHM. I AM blessed. I wouldn't have it ANY other way, but SH*T...I'm DONE!!! Momma's tired."
In case you had your doubts, which I didn't, Oeser assures readers she loves her kids, adding, "but GOOD GOD...I have SIX!!!"
Well clearly you deserve this break! Bottoms up!
About the photo's popularity on Facebook, where it's garnered thousands of reactions and shares, Oeser told Parents.com: "I'm hoping other moms DO take time to laugh. Stop taking life so seriously. And PLEASE, PLEASE stop judging one another. We're all over here trying to do the same thing...raise our kids to be decent human beings, and not a bunch of judgey turds."
Are you celebrating your kids going back to school?
Melissa Willets is a writer/blogger and a mom. Follow her on Twitter (@Spitupnsuburbs), where she chronicles her love of exercising and drinking coffee, but never simultaneously.