I had just gotten in line with my daughter to pay for a new potty when I placed it on the floor to get my wallet. I had barely set it down, when I turned to find my daughter sitting on it -- peeing! Mortified, I quickly ran to the restroom carrying a proud toddler and an unpaid potty full of urine.
Somerville, New Jersey
I had scolded my 3-year-old for drawing on herself with a pen. The next day we were in line at McDonald's when she noticed a man with tattoos all over his arms. She watched him closely for several minutes and then shouted, "Mommy, he wrote all over himself. Is he in trouble?" Thankfully, the nice man had a hearty laugh.
Parker City, Indiana
I was grocery shopping with my son, who was in a carrier on my back. Since I had been walking for quite a while, I decided to take a break and sit against a nearby wall. A few seconds later, the fire alarm went off. My son had accidentally pulled it while I was resting! The entire building was evacuated, and the fire department had to come. I was incredibly embarrassed.
My 2-year-old son and I were at the mall walking near a pregnant woman, when he asked me if she had a baby in her stomach. After I said yes, he looked at me in the front and in the back and happily asked, "Where is your baby, Mama? In your butt?" Everyone within earshot had a big laugh.
Budd Lake, New Jersey
I was paying the pizza delivery man when my 3-year-old son came running up to the door. Smiling widely he said, "Hello. My mom is mean, and she always yells at us." I couldn't get the door closed fast enough!
Cedar Rapids, Iowa
To keep my toddler busy while I paid for some purchases, I put him on top of the checkout counter and gave him my purse. Unfortunately, he reached in, pulled out a tampon, and handed it to the male cashier. To this day, I don't know who was more embarrassed -- the cashier or I.
We were hiking with our 3-year-old when he told us he had to use the potty. Since there wasn't a bathroom nearby, my husband took him into the woods. Our son quickly caught on to this new concept. The next day I saw him peeing on our neighbor's lawn.
My weaning toddler often tries to grab my breasts when he's hungry. One day at a restaurant, he grabbed our waitress's chest. I was mortified!
East Longmeadow, Massachusetts
Originally published in American Baby magazine, October 2004.