Although so many women struggle to expand their families, miscarriage is something we don't talk nearly enough about. In turn, one of the most heartwrenching aspects of having a miscarriage is a feeling of isolation. That's just one reason it's so heartening to hear that Gabrielle Union is opening up about her experience in her new memoir We're Going to Need More Wine.
The Being Mary Jane actress, who has been married to NBA star Dwyane Wade since April 2014 and is a stepmom to Wade's kids from a previous marriage, shares in the book, "I have had eight or nine miscarriages. For three years, my body has been a prisoner of trying to get pregnant —I’ve either been about to go into an IVF cycle, in the middle of an IVF cycle, or coming out of an IVF cycle.”
Meanwhile, she'd have to contend with the side effects of the exhuasting process: "Once a month I look like I’m in my second trimester because I’m bloated. It leads to the questions and it leads to the rumors and anytime I go into a doctor’s office I feel like I’m a member of SEAL Team Six undercover, because I don’t want people to speculate.”
This isn't the first time Union has opened up about infertility. Back in 2015, she touched on her struggle to Redbook: "So far, it has not happened for us. A lot of my friends deal with this."
And facing an uphill battle with conception isn't the only thing Union and her friends have to contend with. In her book, she discusses the tremendous societal pressure to become a mom that women face. “For so many women, and not just women in the spotlight, people feel very entitled to know, ‘Do you want kids?'” Union writes in an excerpt obtained by People. “A lot of people, especially people that have fertility issues, just say ‘no’ because that’s a lot easier than being honest about whatever is actually going on. People mean so well, but they have no idea the harm or frustration it can cause.”
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With hope, Union's candid take will do even more to further not only the conversation around fertility issues but compassion for the incredibly strong, resilient women who face them.