He's got a late night talk show for a reason — Jimmy Fallon is absolutely hilarious. And since becoming a dad to two adorable daughters — Winnie Rose and Frances Cole it seems the "Saturday Night Live" alum has even more (relatable) fodder to crack up his fans. From holding his nose while changing diapers to the enigma that is assembling baby gear, here are 14 of Jimmy Fallon's most spot-on parenting quotes.
1. On fertility struggles: "People have struggled longer than [my wife and I] did, but there's shots involved and acupuncture and sleeping upside down. We tried everything. There's the embarrassment of telling people that we're having one and we're pregnant and then it's not working out. You have to go out and be funny every night and tell jokes and act like nothing's going wrong. But that's being a comedian — that's the job."
So awesome that Jimmy shared this. It just goes to show that everyone has their struggles.
2. On changing diapers: "I don't breath through my nose, so I totally plug my nose.... And then I have these wipes and I wipe, and I wipe down, and then I wipe — I wipe too much. At this point they're just going all over the baby, I'm just making sure there's nothing around. Then I put this diaper rash thing on that I also use, so I save money."
Hey, no one ever said babies were cheap!
3. On how parenthood changes a marriage: "If you're lucky enough to have kids, it's the greatest thing in the whole wide world. You experience it together and it's the whole reason you get married in the first place. You want to experience these things together. It's just a magical, fun thing and it makes marriage better."
It may not always be an easy ride, but having a child with the person you love is the greatest experience anyone could have.
4. On parenting advice: "I heard a lot of advice about having a baby, but until you have one, I don't really know if it's that meaningful to you."
Exactly. No one knows what kind of parent they'll be until they actually become one.
5. On becoming an amateur photographer: "All my iPhone photos are now just all baby."
Not a parent in the world who can't relate to that!
6. On baby spit up: "They vomit a lot. For a second, I thought I needed to rename my first 'Linda Blair' and hire a priest."
There aren't enough burp cloths and bibs in the world for that first year.
Awww. The things we do for our kids!
8. On poop: "People think they can talk to you about poop [once you have a baby]. 'Oh, you have a new baby? Is she sleeping? Is she pooping?' Normally I'd be blushing, but as a parent you just get used to it, and pooping is just another verb in your vocabulary.
More like the word in your vocabulary.
9. On having daughters: "Moms should know that even the manliest guys will become softies when they have daughters. Dads immediately fall in love with their little girls, and will let them get away with everything. So moms are going to have to be the disciplinarians when it comes to daughters."
So, that's how it works, Jimmy?
10. On wanting his kids' first words to be 'dada': "I don't care if my baby's dumb, as long as she says 'dada' first. That's not my problem, that's the teacher's problem."
Every mom and dad knows that it's a small victory when they say your name first.
11. On things being easier the second time around: "As simple as it sounds, just holding a baby [was easier the second time]. When we first had Winnie I would squeeze her really tight and close to me like I was holding a football running for a touchdown."
Babies are so scary when they're your first. By the second, though, Mom and Dad are old pros.
12. On loving family life: "There are nights when you're sitting on your couch, and you're with your beautiful wife — who you can't believe married you — and your beautiful baby — who you feel endlessly grateful you were able to have — and your dog, and you're watching 'Real Housewives' getting into fist-fights on TV and you go, 'How great is my life?'"
Once you have a family, it doesn't matter where you are or what you're doing — as long as you're together.
13. On becoming 'that guy': "I never thought I'd ever be that annoying person, but as soon as Winnie was born I was showing iPhone snaps to a cab driver."
No one thinks they'll become that person. But everyone becomes that person.
They all look so simple, but seven hours later...