For some time, Charmed's Holly Marie Combs wasn't a mother, but she played one on TV. Yet on-air pregnancy, delivery, and child-rearing didn't really prepare the WB's good witch for her first nonfiction baby adventures.
"Faking it was much easier. I got to give the baby back to its rightful owner and go home for a good night's sleep. Before you have a baby, friends tell you 'sleep now,' and you laugh because you don't think that all those stories could be true. But they are."
"I was worried -- I wasn't sure I had the maternal instinct. But the minute my son came out, he was my favorite person on earth. I was crazily in tune with him, and I knew we were going to be fine."
"I had a few fibroids removed, and they left me with a Grand Canyon of scar tissue in my uterus. The doctors weren't sure I'd be able to reproduce. I was prepared for a rough road, and then out of nowhere we conceived."
"The extra weight was a shocker. I'm only 5'2" and gained 40 pounds. And unfortunately, I was photographed the entire time."
"I can't understand people who don't find out the minute they can. Both my husband and I wanted a boy. I wasn't sure what I'd do with a daughter. What if she asked for a Barbie? I would have been like, 'Honey, we don't support Barbie because she isn't an accurate depiction of a woman's body."
"I printed a list of Irish names from the Internet and my husband, Dave, saw 'Finley' on the list. I really liked it but didn't want to scare Dave off with my enthusiasm. So I used a little reverse psychology and let him think it was his idea."
"Because of my earlier surgery, I had a scheduled c-section. The day before, I read that only 10 percent of women's waters break at home. I thought it was interesting because water breaking is always what you see in movies -- we'd even done it on my show. Then I swear I stood up and my water was all over the floor. I panicked."
"I was unprepared for the c-section. I was asleep for fibroid surgery, but you have to be awake for a c-section, and the doctors were silent through a lot of it. I also experienced horrible shakes. The more I tried to stop, the worse it got, and that freaked Dave out. Friends who had c-sections told me it was a piece of cake. They were lying! The end result was worth it, but it was painful and tiring."
"Swaddling blankets. Dr. Brown's bottles. And the Fisher-Price Ocean Wonders Aquarium Swing, which rocks from side to side, knocks Finley out almost instantly. [My costar] Rose [McGowan] got me a Graco Pack 'N Play, and Finley easily spent the first three months in it -- it was the only place we could get him to sleep."
"I think letting babies cry it out is barbaric. Why would parenting stop when it's dark outside? You can't expect a baby to know that he's supposed to sleep just because we want to go to bed."
"You need to be emotionally ready for a baby, and the best way to do that is to clean skeletons from your own closest. Deal with the baggage of your childhood or you'll just pass it on to your kid. Also, there's nothing like a baby to point out the differences between you and your husband, so discuss big issues beforehand, like breastfeeding, discipline, religion, and school. It helps you become a united front. And, oh yeah, sleep now."
Carrie Bell is an entertainment writer and reporter in Los Angeles.
Originally published in American Baby magazine, April 2005.