Q: My daughter is 4-years-old and is in preschool two days a week. Recently, she was observed being mean and very snobby toward other girls in her class. My husband and I have both talked to her about being nice to everyone and being friends with everyone, but she continues to tell other girls that she doesn't want to be their friend. I need advice on how to deal with my daughter's behaviors.

A: Teach your child to make friends by having playdates at your home where you can regulate the activities. If weekday playdates are difficult, as they often are, set aside weekend time to invite friendsso you can be around to oversee the play. Have back-up games and activities planned so that you can intercede to make the playdate work if you hear things going badly. Invite just one friend over at a time, to reduce the "targets" for a tough child, and rotate the different friends.  They should all be classmates, so that school time can then become more enjoyable for all involved.

Answered by Dr. Harley A. Rotbart



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