Mom's Viral Self-Care TikTok Doesn't Go as Planned, Serving as Sweet Reminder That Motherhood Can Be Messy

So many moms could relate to the TikToker's (semi) failed attempt at taking time out for herself.

Parenthood is a trip. You love spending time with your kids. You feel guilty about not being able to cuddle them longer, put your heart and soul into homecooked meals, and pack your day with fun-filled adventures.

And yet, sometimes, you can't help but crave just a moment of peace and quiet. One TikTok mom needed a second, and she wanted to spend it with her followers. So, like a modern-day parent, she filmed a video and put it on the platform.

But, as happens to often in parenthood, things didn't go exactly as planned.

Amber, or @sensible_Amber on TikTok, comes on video as the words "This was supposed to be a self-care video" appear. She's walking through her house (which, by the way, looks very organized for someone with a couple of rugrats running around—good for you, mama).

"Hey mama," she starts. "You've worked out. Me too. Here's what we're going to do. We're going to give the kids the tablets for just a minute. We're going to go someplace quiet and just hide just for a minute."

Amber sits behind the couch and takes out a chocolate treat. She playfully gives one to her followers by throwing it towards the camera and saying, "Nice catch."

Then she lets out a sigh that sounds like part relief, part bliss, and part exasperation. "Why are they so loud? Always so loud," she says with a slight laugh as she takes a bite of her brownie. You can hear her kids happily playing in the background.

And then, the inevitable happens. A little boy pops up on the couch behind Amber.

"Ohh, can I have a chocolate brownie?" he asks.

Amber sights with a smile and hands the brownie to her son. "Here you go, kiddo."

The words "but it turned into a motherhood is messy and beautiful video."

In a super-sweet plot twist, the boy decided not to take the brownie, telling Mom, "You can have it." A little girl comes over to snuggle with Amber as the dog barks.

"I tried," Amber said. "Maybe next time, mama."

The video has nearly 600 comments in less than a day of parents who can totally relate.

"If this isn't the most mom video ever," said one person. "Most relatable mom self-care video I've ever seen," another replied.

And one commenter revealed the way she got herself a moment of solace.

"I took a half-day off work and told no one so I could come home and take a nap," the person wrote.

But another lamented that the whole "it takes a village to raise a child" thing seems to have disappeared in modern times.

"Humans were not meant to raise children the way we do today. We need to get back to helping one another. It really does take a village," the commenter said.

It's true. Recently, one mom highlighted how ridiculous some people's definition of "self-care" is for mothers (i.e. pooping with the door closed). Here's he truth: Self-care is not selfish, even if you have a child or children.

An image of a mom with her kids during a hectic morning.
Getty Images.

Here are some actual, expert-backed ways to care for yourself:

  • Exercise. The CDC suggests getting in at least 150 minutes of moderate-intensity exercise per week (That's 30 minutes five times per week). Walking counts. You can keep it fun, too—living room dance parties with the littles, anyone?
  • Eat nutritious foods. As a parent, it's so easy to care more about what your child eats and forget to eat yourself. Simple ways to eat and drink healthier include swapping soda for water and going vegetarian once per week.
  • Connect with friends and family. A weekly date night may not be in the cards, depending on your schedule and childcare situation. But experts share even getting out with friends or your partner once per month for some adults-only time can be beneficial, even if it's just one night out per month
  • Sleep. The CDC says a lack of sleep can increase your risk for heart disease and depression. Aim to get at least seven hours per night. Remember: You'll be more patient present with your kids the next day if you caught enough Zzz's.
  • Write. Some parents took up writing during the pandemic as a way to reflect and de-stress. Try journaling your feelings each day or a couple of times per week.
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