The Redditor described one way parents can ensure they're taking a much-needed, well-deserved time-out.

By Maressa Brown
July 20, 2021
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An image of a woman in a spa.
Credit: Getty Images. Art: Jillian Sellers.

At this point, the term "self-care" has been so overused that it's kind of laughable—especially to parents who want to know how in the world they're supposed to fit that in on top of everything else. But a dad of three is determined to make sure that his wife has a self-care game plan she can rely on. Writing recently in the Parenting subreddit under the handle u/DVant10denC, he shared that he kicks his wife out of the house at least twice a month.

The original poster (OP) noted that he and his wife have three kids who are 2, 4, and 15. "The 15-year-old is mostly self-sufficient but taxing in their own special way," he wrote. "My 2- and 4-year-old aren't always on their best behavior and on more than a few occasions, entirely tax my wife emotionally, physically, and psychologically."

He explained that something they've started doing is "swap out of the house activities." "I go do my nerd stuff roughly 3 hours every other Saturday, and she will do a variety of self-care activities during her Saturdays," he wrote. Those activities could include going to the spa, salon, getting a massage, etc.

But these outings aren't limited to every other Saturday. "Some days are far worse than others, and on those days, I kick her out of the house, and tell her not to be home before 7," wrote the OP. "Usually giving her at the very least two hours for self care on those rough days."

He concluded, "Family life isn't always about the kids. Spouses need and deserve their own time. So spouses out there that are able to... don't be afraid to kick them out every once in a while."

Fellow Redditors applauded the dad's post and shared similar experiences. u/jizzypuff wrote, "My husband does this a lot, he takes our daughter for errands. I expect them to be gone for an hour, and four hours later they waltz in. He apparently decides to take her off-roading so I have extra time to myself."

And u/Anon-eight-billion noted that her husband takes the kids out for "errands and the park and lunch," so she could "take a bath and watch a movie and relax at home." "On his way out the door, he forbade me to clean a single thing while they were all gone, so I didn't feel guilty about the playroom still being a mess or the dishes still piled in the sink when they got back," said the Redditor.

The post did make some commenters wish that their spouse would think like the OP. "I wish my husband would do this," wrote u/four2andnew. "He's totally cool if I wanted to disappear for a few hours, but the moment ask him to take kids out so I could just chill with my book and jammies, suddenly he can't manage all 3 kids by himself."

u/FlamingoStrange8386 admitted that the post made them cry. "Self-care is so important, but it seems we don't allow moms the energy to take care of themselves or even notice them and ask them how their feeling," the Redditor wrote. "A lot of criticism, sure, but no, how are YOU doing, really?"

They summed the issue up beautifully: "Remember, parents. We've got to take care of ourselves to teach our little ones the same. Let's kick some of this mom (and dad) guilt outta here!!"