Want to guarantee a few hearty holiday laughs? Serve up these Thanksgiving kid's jokes and funny turkey puns alongside the mashed potatoes.

By Fiona Tapp
September 14, 2020
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So why did the turkey keep crossing the road? To prove he wasn't chicken, of course!

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We polled a group of turkey-loving kids for their favorite Thanksgiving jokes and these are their best (AKA corniest) gags for the holiday. To get in on the fun, consider starting a new Thanksgiving tradition in your family by supplementing the usual gratitude sharing with a round of jokes. Write down a few of your favorite jokes from the list and put one on each place setting before dinner. Then have everyone share their joke before dessert!

  1. What kind of key cannot open a door? "A Tur-key" — Lewis, age 8
  2. What did the turkey say on Thanksgiving? — "Quack, quack!" Savannah, age 9
  3. "My family said I had to stop telling Thanksgiving jokes. But I told them I couldn’t quit cold turkey!" — Thomas, age 9
  4. Why did the turkey keep crossing the road? "To prove he wasn't chicken!" — Claire age 7
  5. What did the one-legged turkey say? "Wobble wobble!" — Asham age 7
  6. "My mom said she wanted my help to fix Thanksgiving dinner. I said, why? Is it broken?" — Lakeisha age 9
  7. What sort of music did the pilgrims listen to? "Plymouth Rock" — Zayed, age 11
  8. What do you call a turkey the day after Thanksgiving? "Lucky!" — Suzie, age 5
  9. What did the turkey say? "Boy, I am stuffed!" — Ben, age 4
  10. What do you call a turkey that's running? "Fast food!" — Becky, age 8
  11. Why were the pilgrims' pants always falling down? "Because they wore their belt buckles on their hats!" — Sammie, age 7
  12. What smells the best at Thanksgiving dinner? "Your nose! Nobody ever gets it!" — Deena, age 5
  13. What's the pumpkin's favorite sport? "Squash!" — Hudson, age 6.5
  14. Which side of the turkey has the most feathers? "The outside! This one's gross!" — Simon age, 11
  15. Why could the turkey, the monkey, and the donkey all open the door? "Because they all have keys!" — Ben, age 4
  16. What happens if you're mean to a cranberry? "It becomes a blueberry!" — Zayed, age 10
  17. What are you most thankful for this Thanksgiving? "I am just thankful I am not a turkey!" — Marie, age 13
  18. Why can't the Thanksgiving band play today? "Somebody ate the drumsticks!" — Victoria, age 12
  19. When the pilgrims landed, where did they stand? "On their feet!" — Tanya, age 9
  20. What did the pilgrims use to make cookies? "May-flour!" — Charlie, age 7
  21. Where does Christmas come before Thanksgiving? "In the dictionary!" — Maisie, age 8

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