Excited to be expecting? (Or, you know, terrified?) Here are 13 movie quotes that totally nail the good, the bad, and the hilarious of pregnancy.
1. I'm itchy everywhere, my ankles are fat, and there's something hanging out of my butt."
— Darcy, FOR KEEPS
2. "I could so go for like a huge cookie right now, with like, a lamb kabob simultaneously."
— Juno, MacGuff, JUNO
3. "Why don't you try squeezing something the size of a watermelon out of an opening the size of a lemon and see how hot YOU look?"
— Mollie, LOOK WHO'S TALKING
4. "If I knew I'd have a rack this gorgeous, I would've gotten knocked up years ago."
— Jules, WHAT TO EXPECT WHEN YOU'RE EXPECTING
5. "I want drugs, massive amounts of drugs. I want the maximum legal limit of drugs."
— Jenna, WAITRESS
6. Rebecca: "I'm 10 days late."
Samuel: "And there's no way you could have had [your period] and just not noticed?"
– NINE MONTHS
7. "Stretch marks are the real badge of a woman."
— Mr. Babrucz, FOR KEEPS
8. "Can I just spray a little PAM down there right before the baby comes out?"
– Angie, BABY MAMA
9. Dr. Pomatter: "I want to talk to you, somewhere outside of here. Maybe we can have a coffee or something?"
Jenna: "I can't have coffee, it's on the bad food list you gave to me."
10. "I just wanted the glow—the one that they promise you on the cover of those magazines. Well, I'm calling it: Pregnancy sucks! Making a human being is really hard, I have no control over my body or my emotions. Gar-bear, I'm sorry, all I want to do is punch you in the face."
— Wendy, WHAT TO EXPECT WHEN YOU'RE EXPECTING
11. Thea: "I look ridiculous. These jeans are elastic on the top. I feel like I'm wearing a condom on my stomach."Lisa: "Trust me, you don't look like you've been anywhere NEAR a condom."
— LABOR PAINS
12. "Can I use the facilities? Because being pregnant makes me pee like Seabiscuit."
— Juno MacGuff, JUNO
13. "The pain is so enlightening. And now having experienced childbirth, I watch CNN and I really feel like I understand war."
— LN, AWAY WE GO