The best dad jokes are so bad they're good. And thankfully, there's one tailored for just about every occasion. Consider learning how to deliver these dad jokes for Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, and more your pre-holiday homework.

By Meredith C. Carroll
October 11, 2019
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Illustration by Emma Darvick

The only thing funnier than a dad joke—besides, well, pretty much anything—is the dad telling the joke. They think they're funny, but they're snot.

What dad jokes lack in actually comedy though, they more than make up for in entertainment. Whether it's winter, spring, summer or fall, don't go into a holiday (or any day) without a suitcase full of the best dad jokes to make your audience groan.

Halloween Dad Jokes

Why are graveyards so noisy? Because of all the coffin.

Why didn't the mummy have any friends? He was too wrapped up in himself.

Why does everyone think Mrs. Jones is rich? Because she passes out 100 Grand to each trick-or-treater.

Thanksgiving Dad Jokes

Where do you find a turkey with no legs? Exactly where you left it.

Why did the rock band hire a turkey? Because he had the drumsticks.

Christmas Dad Jokes

Why is Santa so good at karate? Because he has a black belt.

Valentine's Day Dad Jokes

Did you hear about the bed bugs who fell in love? They're getting married in the spring.

Easter Dad Jokes

Why was the Easter Bunny so upset? He was having a bad hare day.

Birthday Dad Jokes

Sports Dad Jokes

Why did Cinderella get kicked off the baseball team? Because she ran away from the ball.

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