1. The Car Seat Catastrophe
You glance in the rearview mirror just in time to see “the” red face. Maybe it’s just gas? Nope, there’s the grunt. Game over. You can choose to carry on and stage a hazmat-worthy clean up in the grocery store parking lot, or return home and accept that you are now exclusively an online shopper.
2. The Tarzan
You finally got the car seat catastrophe cleaned up (well, kind of) but you forgot extra clothes for the baby! But hey, you’ve made it this far, why let a little thing like pants stop you? “No Shirt, No Shoes, No Service” only applies to adults, right? You sure hope so, because your toddler has also taken his pants off in solidarity.
3. The Death Roll
Crocodiles often use a series of rapid and powerful rotations to subdue their prey. Once a death roll starts, it is almost impossible to stop it. This death roll is similar, but instead of a crocodile, it’s your 1-year-old with half of a full diaper still attached to her.
4. The Houdini
There was something in this diaper a second ago, you know it. You SAW it. You took off the diaper, reached for a wipe, and when you turned back—poof—it was gone. BUT WHERE DID IT GO?! Did it roll onto the floor? Was it never really there? Oh no…is it under your shoe?
5. The Lord of the Dance
The spirit of Ireland is alive and well in your little kicker! You struggle in vain to get his pants back on as he pelts you with his fast and furious footwork. Does he ever kick this much any other time? It doesn’t matter—this is his calling now! Erin go bragh, little lad!
6. The Hoodwink
Hmmm, the baby needs to be changed again. Maybe if you pretend like you’re in the middle of an incredibly complicated task someone else will do it. Be sure to make loud sighs periodically to let everyone know you can’t be bothered. You are a genius.
7. The Web MD
Is this poo normal? It doesn’t look normal. Or does it? Ugh, you don’t know. You’d better send 15 pictures of it to your spouse at work.
8. The Diaper Dash
Your objective: change your child’s diaper. The challenge: you have to catch her first. Suddenly, your once wobbly toddler can clear tight corners like a race car. She’s like a tiny Lightning McQueen! But don’t worry, your prize when you finally catch her is…a dirty diaper. At least you know there won't be any leaks (if she's wearing Huggies Little Movers Diapers, which have contoured shape that fits your baby best, even when she sprints around the room). Plus, you’re getting some exercise.
9. The Whodunit
Does someone need to be changed or is it just gas? No one is owning up to it. Not even the dog.
10. The Catch-22
You need a changing pad from your diaper bag so you don’t have to set your baby on a gross public changing table, but to get the changing pad out of your diaper bag you have to set your baby down on the gross public changing table.
11. The Mystery
Oh, so THAT’S what it is! You really need to ask grandma to stop feeding the baby so many blueberries.
12. The Duck and Cover
Please don’t pee, please don’t pee, please don’t p-