If you really want to help a mom out, keep the advice to yourself.

By Hollee Actman Becker
September 22, 2016

A few weeks ago we introduced you to mom blogger Tova Leigh's all-too-real video rant about the things we use differently once we get preggers and start popping out the kids. Now the hilarious mama is at it again with a new diatribe, this one about all the annoying parenting advice new moms get tossed their way pretty much on the regular. There's nothing worse than being bombarded with unsolicited input disguised as "help" while trying to navigate those first tricky weeks of parenthood. And it all starts that very first night when you bring the baby home, and suddenly every single person you've ever met in your entire life turns out to be a sleep expert.

"The first thing people always ask you when you've just had a baby is 'Is she sleeping through the night,'" Leigh begins in the video. "No...uh, she's a baby. She's up all night—pooping, eating, laughing in my face, slowing sucking my will to live. But thank you so much for asking."

And this kind of priceless truthbomb is exactly why we love her!

"Then they start giving you all these tips and advice," Leigh continues. "Have you tried co-sleeping? She'll sleep so much better in her own room! Babies love noise—turn the Hoover on, turn the radio on, make sure people are screaming around the house the whole time."

Next up: Leigh takes on that one end-all-be-all magical piece of advice I know we've all probably gotten at least once: "You just need to sleep when the baby sleeps."

"But the baby never sleeps," she laments in a frustrated voice that sounds suspiciously like Cookie Monster's.

"And if we go by that logic," she continues, "does that mean I need to poop when the baby poops? Or cry when the baby cries? Oh wait... I already do that."

Don't we all.

A mom herself, Leigh told Parents.com that she knows most parenting advice is given with the best of intentions. "But it's very rarely 'useful,'" she added, "because I think we kind of need to figure it out for ourselves."

So true! But that hasn't stopped the funny mom-of-three from breaking the new parent code on occasion, like that time when she recently bumped into a friend who has a new baby and was thisclose to imploring her to sleep when the baby sleeps.

"It hit me in that moment that this type of comment wasn't really going to help her, just like it did not help me when people said it to me after I had my twins and felt I was going to lose my mind," Leigh told us. "Instead, I offered to take her baby for a couple of hours so she could sleep. I've never seen her so happy. She literally jumped out of her chair and kissed me."

Unsolicited babysitting? Now that's the kind of interference we'd totally welcome.

Hollee Actman Becker is a freelance writer, blogger, and a mom. Check out her website holleeactmanbecker.com for more, and then follow her on Twitter at @holleewoodworld.

Comments (1)

December 2, 2018
My baby never slept well (especially through the night) until I started using the website >>SleepBaby .org<< - that website has been by far one of the best things I've ever got my hands on to get him to fall asleep quickly. Best time is 45 seconds from awake to asleep! Can’t imagine life without it! I heard about it through a kindergarten teacher who uses it to put to sleep a group of 30 children. Check it out! >>SleepBaby .org<< - sorry, you can't post links here so you'll have to turn it into a normal link :) Best of luck to you and your family!