"I told my husband it was going to be our last try," Caldwell explained to Parents.com. "That I couldn't emotionally handle losing another child. However, I wanted another child desperately. And we got pregnant again...my issue was never getting pregnant, it was staying pregnant. I felt guilty that I never felt excited. [I was] just waiting for something to go wrong pretty much up until the day I gave birth."
But Saylor was worth every moment of heartache, Caldwell says, because of the joy she feels every time she looks at her. "She is my beauty that has appeared in the midst of the darkness and clouds," she told us, adding that the inspiration for taking the photo—which was Fetherolf's idea, by the way—was to let other women who are suffering know that they are not alone, and that sunshine follows even the darkest times.
"It was a way to share my loss as well as my gratitude," Caldwell explained. "It's a bittersweet combination of personal pain and joy. Every time I look at the photo it reminds me how truly blessed I am, and how all the pain I endured was worth it."
Beautiful image, beautiful baby, beautiful story.