Watch your back, 1D. There's a new boy band in town.
Ok, make that dad band.
Celebs fathers Ashton Kutcher, his That 70s Show bud Danny Masterson, and talk-show host James Corden teamed up to form the Puff Daddies—solid name choice, right? They unleashed their first single, aptly titled "I. M. A. Dad," on Corden's show last night.
Here's how it all went down: Decked out in hoodies, skull caps, and some serious facial scruff, the trio rolled on stage to huge cheers, pushing strollers with plastic baby dolls strapped to their chests.
Um, guys? You kinda don't need the strollers if you've already got your little nuggets secure in their infant carriers. But hey, it's always good to be prepared, right? So we're gonna just let that one slide.
After greeting each other with the requisite fist bumps and "S'ups," Masterson, who has a daughter with wife Bijou Phillips, fires off a quick complaint about his kid eating sand before he and the Puff posse get busy schooling the audience about life as a dad via song.
First on the mic is Kutcher, who has 1-year-old daughter Wyatt with wife Mila Kunis, styling with the lyrics, "I don't play games, 'cept for peek-a-boo. When I talk about my baby girl, I don't mean you."
Those are some pretty stellar rhymes, right there. This dad's apparently got some skillz.
Now check out another sample lyric, this one sung by Corden, who has two kids under 4 with wife Julia: "I'm never at the club, but I'm up all night long. My kid hates bedtime, and wakes up at dawn."
The struggle is just so real. But in case you're still not convinved, the trio brings it home with the chorus:
"I'm a dad, I'm a dad. I don't go to movies. I'm a dad, I'm a dad. I don't know that song. I'm a dad, I'm a dad. My dance moves are goofy. I'm a daaaaad. So get off my lawn."
The guys then whip their "babies" out of their respective Bjorns and start tossing them around to each other on stage. As a finale, they lead the audience in a madcap version of "The Wheels on the Bus."
Obviously, this whole thing was just a parody, but I'm not gonna lie...this tune is seriously catchy. I mean, I haven't been able to stop singing the chorus all morning and I'm, you know, a mom.
Which just begs the question: Will Mila et al form a mom group—Iron Maidens? Twisted Sisters? Word to Your Mothers?—in order to retaliate?