How do I tell a friend that I may not feel up to attending her wedding just a few weeks after I give birth?

Q: I’m pregnant and a close friend is getting married a few weeks after my baby’s due date. She’s really counting on my being there. But even though it’s a local wedding, I don’t know if I’m going to feel up to going so soon after giving birth. How can I tell her that without offending her?

A: I’m assuming your pal doesn’t have kids. But it doesn’t take being a mom for her to know that it won’t be easy for you to make a firm commitment now, not when you don’t really know when your baby will make his or her big debut or whether you’ll be firmly planted in a glider postpartum, nursing around the clock. Then again, after a few weeks home with a newborn you might be dying to slip out of the house for a couple of hours to fête your friend. As long as the bride’s okay with it—and you can promise to give your response in time to meet her deadline for a final head count—keep things open: “I truly want to be there, but it just might not be possible depending on when my baby arrives.”