It can be a bit more challenging beyond the infant stage, but every child can be taught to self-soothe and fall asleep by himself," says Parents advisor Judith Owens, MD, coauthor of Take Charge of Your Child's Sleep. There are different ways to get him snoozing solo. Choose the one that works best for your lifestyle and your child's temperament.
The hard-line strategy: You put your child to bed and leave. Try your best to ignore any protests, and if he comes out of his room escort him back and simply say, "You need to stay in bed." Some experts suggest putting a gate up so there's no escape. This technique can be tough on both parent and child but often works well and quickly, says Dr. Owens.
The graduated method: You put your child to bed but tell him that you'll come back in five minutes to check on him -- and you follow through with that promise. Then, keep checking on him, waiting successively longer intervals of time before going back into his room. Eventually, your child will get bored waiting and fall asleep. This is the method most parents choose.
The gentle approach: You stay in your child's room but don't lie in his bed or interact with him. For example, the first night sit in a chair by his bed. Each night, move farther away from him. Ideally, by the time you've edged your way out of the room he has learned to fall asleep on his own.
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Our daughter is 18 months old and still sleeps in our room at night. She falls asleep on her own and sometimes sleeps through the night, but regularly she wakes up wanting to sleep with us. I think she's ready to move to a regular bed but that means sharing a room with her older sister. My concern is that if she gets up crying, she'll wake the older kids and they won't get the sleep they need for school, etc. Any suggestions?
10/25/2011 02:54:18 PM Report AbuseSince day one, we've put our son to bed on his own room, with the lights off and door closed, and we've had very few issues. Earlier on it was hunger, but now, at 18 months, bedtime is so fun, easy and painless that we rarely give it a second thought. Some nights he's almost instantly asleep, while other nights he babbles and talks himself to sleep.
6/15/2011 12:57:33 AM Report AbuseMy 18 month old has been going to sleep no problem - provided I'm the one putting him down. I place him in his crib, shush and sooth him for about a minute and leave asleep or not. My wife on the other hand likes to have him fall asleep in her arms or in our bed and it's a production every time. She's fine with it but I sometimes have to takeover and I put him down within minutes. Resist the temptation to coddle your toddler at bed time. Tell him it's sleep time, kiss kiss and that is that!
6/7/2011 01:00:54 PM Report AbuseI took the hard line approach to the bed time thing with my 19 month old. I had started to put him in his big boy bed for naps two weeks before we moved and he knew that it was his. Then when we got to the new house it was easier not to put the crib up and tell him that he had to sleep in his big boy bed. I put the gate up after the first week and stil have the monitor in our room so Im right there if he needs me.
5/25/2011 04:34:08 PM Report Abuseour daughter is 18 months old and has been sleeping in her toddler bed for 3 months alone but would wake up throughout the night about 3 times for her sippy cup...now she's starting to climb in bed with us and still want her sippy cup...HELP!!!!
3/9/2011 07:50:40 AM Report Abusefor heatherhicks06 - Try to leave a shirt that you or your husband has worn in the crib with him. Does your son have a lovey -that really worked great for my son. The more times you take him out the harder it's going to get him to stop wanting to sleep in your bed. He will cry but each night it should get shorter until he learns that he won't be sleeping with mommy and daddy.
2/1/2011 11:57:21 AM Report AbuseI just wanted to say that the graduated method worked beautifully. It worked the first day and and has worked for several days now with no issues.She is in her big girl bed and has fallen asleep every night reading her book during the 10 minute increment. Asleep with in 15 minutes every night....ahhh a sigh of relief
1/30/2011 10:09:12 AM Report AbuseI NEED HELP ~ My son is 13 months old and we are having major trouble getting him to sleep all night in his crib.He will not fall sleep unless he is our bed with either my husband or myself,then once we put him in his crib he'll wake up crying but as soon as he hits our bed again he's sleep.I have tried every thing in the book as far as letting him cry it out,or rubbing his back,reading to him,he has had the same routine at bedtime since 3 months of age.I need ideas please!
12/23/2010 12:01:04 AM Report AbuseMy son is 19m old. He doesnt get a non stop sleep in the night. He gets up in the between. and bed wetting also. Pls tell me a remedy.
11/14/2010 09:55:51 PM Report AbuseMy son is 19 months old and we have always held him until he falls asleep, and lately about 2 hours after I put him in his bed he wakes up crying and won't go back to sleep unless I am right there and when I leave he wakes up crying again. What would be the best way to help with this problem? courty816 I moved my son into a toddler bed just a few months ago and it is actually so much easier.
11/9/2010 06:27:18 PM Report AbuseI have my 18m old going to bed in a toddler bed. He protest sometimes but stays in bed. My problem is he wake up at night and comes to our room and climbs in or I put him there so I can go back to sleep. Any suggestions on how to break this habit?
9/21/2010 12:15:33 PM Report AbuseI am where annieboo143 is...My daughter is 18 months old and for about a month and a half she has not wanted to go to bed. My husband has resorted to driving her, but that is every night. We used to let her cry but she would just not stop. We have to stop the driving as she is now used to it, but to let her cry for over 2 hours? We just don't know.
9/8/2010 08:55:53 PM Report AbuseWe are doing the hard-line stratagy with our 19mo old. He knows how to self-soothe and fall asleep on his own, though he doesnt always want to. Some nights he will scream for a little while until he gives up. I dont go in to check on him until I know he is asleep, then I cover him up and lay his favorite bunny beside him.
6/22/2010 06:30:45 PM Report AbuseMy daughter who is now 19 months has always slept in her own bed, she would go to sleep on her own no problem. But the past two weeks she has changed. She knows its bed time and we go do are same routine as always but when she sees her room it starts and when i lay her in the bed and just walk away when she starts screaming she will not stop i gave it 45 min one night until i finally had to get her. How can i make her go back to going to sleep on her own and all night?
6/8/2010 08:12:25 PM Report AbuseMy 18-month old is waking up every night around the same time. I am trying to break that habit. Anyone have suggestions? To Courty816, I think around 18 months is good because they can easily get in and out of bed and they are old enough to know they need to stay in bed to sleep. My oldest went to a toddler bed at 18 months and did great! Haven't done it with my youngest one yet, but plan on trying soon.
5/25/2010 01:39:32 PM Report AbuseI havent tried any of these yet with my four year old but I know that my mom did the graduated method with me when i was little. I remember wanting to go home from a friends house because my mom wasnt there to come and check on me. I never remember her actually checking on me, but it worked for me. I would lay still waiting..
5/18/2010 02:22:46 PM Report AbuseI moved my daughter to a big girl bed at 18 months because she started lying down on my bed and pulling the covers to her chin, saying 'night night'. I would just watch for cues of readiness like that or whenever he can climb out of the crib
4/26/2010 05:39:49 PM Report Abusei like the tips what if you dont have your own house and you are in a shelter or group home with other people
3/17/2010 10:29:41 AM Report AbuseOur son has slept by himself since one week old and has no problems or tantrums when it is bedtime. I am starting to think about moving him to a "big boy bed", when is the right time for that?
3/16/2010 04:17:01 PM Report Abuse