Emotional Aftermath of Miscarriage

The Mourning Period

Grief and mourning can last anywhere from less than a month to a year or more, depending on the circumstances of the miscarriage. Initially, the feelings are intense and all-encompassing. But over time, they begin to ease up, giving way to periods of relative calm, well-being, and, eventually, acceptance.

During the mourning period, however, a woman's (and man's) emotions may be thrown into turmoil. If a woman has been trying hard to conceive, she may mourn the child she has lost as well as the fact that she's no longer pregnant. If she's suffered more than one miscarriage, she may be saddened by the fact that she's unable to carry a pregnancy to term. She may also feel empty, angry, irritable, worthless, or jealous of those who are pregnant, and may be preoccupied with her loss or unable to take pleasure in life.

What's more, men and women often experience a miscarriage differently. Men tend to have less of an emotional attachment to the pregnancy in the early months, so they may feel less pained and grief-stricken by the miscarriage. Sometimes this can cause a misunderstanding and conflict in a marriage, since each partner tends to expect the other to react to the miscarriage in a similar way.

The important thing to remember is that mourning is a process that takes time. While some people are able to put aside their feelings and move on, others find that they need weeks or even months to be able to fully function again. Eventually, though, the pain of a miscarriage will subside and the world will indeed look brighter. But until then, it's important to honor your feelings and to take the time you need to grieve.

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