School Shootings: The Conversation You Need to Have with Your Kids

When something as tragic and frightening as a school shooting occurs, children are bound to have many concerns. We turned to educational psychologist and Parents advisor Michele Borba, EdD, for the five best things you can say to reassure them now.

By Lauren Wiener

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"What have you heard?"

"Chances are your child got wind of the shooting in class or from friends, but kids can easily get the facts wrong or misinterpret them, which escalates their fears," says Borba. Grade-schoolers especially tend to exaggerate things -- "That school is right next to ours!" or "50,000 kids were shot" -- and you want to make sure your child's not worrying over something completely unfounded.

Consider reading the newspaper together as a jumping-off point for conversation and to give them an easy way to bring up tough questions. But if you see them catching the news on TV, don't let them tune in solo: According to a recent survey, tweens find tragic breaking news stressful and frightening without an adult there to help them interpret the information. And go with your gut: Emotional TV images may be too disturbing for sensitive children; in that case, you might be better off talking things through without visuals.

Next: "What are your friends saying?"

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