10 Parenting Debates to Hash Out Before Baby

If you know you want children, Alan M. Singer, Ph.D., family therapist and author of Creating Your Perfect Family Size,, suggests that the most important decision for couples to make is whether it's the right time to have a baby. When Dr. Singer meets with couples ready to get pregnant, he provides 92 self-test questions to help them consider their own mental and physical health, the health of their relationship with each other, and, for those who have one child, how they are doing as parents and how they like parenting.

Along with biological clocks and financial issues to consider, couples should make sure they're on the same page about when they want to start a family. One of you may be eager to go forth and multiply; the other may be hoping for a few more years of couple time before adding Baby to the equation. You might want to come up with a checklist of the things you'd like to do or achieve before embarking on parenthood, paying special attention to things that become more difficult once you have kids. Is there a vacation you'd like to take together? A certain number of years you'd like to wait after you've begun living together? Would any changes in your financial status (a significant promotion or a loan payoff) speed up or slow down your ideal schedule? Drafting a plan can help you realize and respect each other's desires.