Small Talk: How to Get Your Kid to Chat About Her Day

Why You Should Stop Solving Your Child's Problems

When your child is facing a challenge, of course you want to swoop in and save the day. But keep in mind that at school your kid is figuring things out for herself all day long. If you give your child solutions, you'll make her less resourceful. She'll think, "If they aren't like Mom's and Dad's, my ideas must be wrong."

Helping kids solve problems for themselves, on the other hand, is empowering. "When you facilitate instead of taking over, you're subliminally increasing your child's confidence," says Dr. Maidenberg. Ask questions like, "What do you think your options are?" or "What are you most comfortable doing?" If your kid believes she figured things out herself, it will be a self-confidence booster. When your child walks away from a conversation with positive feelings she will come back to talk to you again and again.

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