Handling the Loss of a Parent

Brian Smith

How to celebrate Father's Day when Dad had just died was the heart-wrenching question Melanie Bloom and her daughters faced in June 2003. In April that year, Melanie's husband, NBC correspondent David Bloom, died suddenly from a fatal blood clot while covering the war in Iraq. Two months later the family was still reeling from the shock, and ignoring the day didn't seem possible.

So on Father's Day, Melanie suggested that her children, twins Christine and Nicole, and Ava draw pictures and write letters or poems to their dad. Then they visited his grave and the girls read what they'd written, says Melanie, 42. "It was sad, but very sweet."

But the next Father's Day, the girls didn't want to visit the cemetery or attend a Father's Day barbecue that friends were holding, and Melanie agreed. "If the kids say, 'Can we visit him?,' we do. But if they don't want to, I won't push," says Melanie, noting she plans to do the same this Father's Day. "I let it be organic."

That has turned out to be a good motto for the family. Dealing with the loss of a soulmate is hard enough for any spouse, but doing so while helping your young children grieve is especially difficult. A soft-spoken at-home mom who was married for 13 years, Melanie faced her hardest parenthood challenge in helping her family cope.