According to psychotherapist Lenore Pomerance, the key to a better sex life is learning to separate fertility from sexuality. "There's a vast difference between sex for pleasure and sex for conception, and couples who recognize this can avoid blaming, feeling guilty, or getting turned off by sex for conception," she says.
Pomerance points out that this separation is most essential when your efforts aren't immediately successful. "I've had couples express fears that they couldn't get pregnant because the sex wasn't good enough, or the love failed -- which, of course, has nothing to do with fertility. When partners start feeling flawed or inadequate because they haven't conceived right away, they grow depressed and their sexual feelings are affected."