Posts: 1
Registered: ‎06-26-2014
Re: behavioral issues with 4 1/2 year old son
We have a 5 1/2 daughter, a 3 1/2 son and a 2 year old daughter. Some tips that work quite well at home are:
1) Be consistent. When you say "No" it really means "no". Do not change your mind. Otherwise, next time they will insist when you say no because they know you will eventually give in.
2) I am against spanking and really try hard not to shout, since I think it is not the way to educate. When they do something wrong, I start by telling them I love them more than anything in this world but that I do not like that behavior. And I try also to be consistent with the consequence, such as not play anymore with that toy if he is being rude.
3) I try to dedicate certain times of the day to play with each of them, and give them that special attention that they need. I know it is hard, but at the end of the day it is simpler to spend some 100% time to them, rather than having them all day following you or calling for attention.
4) Give them challenges. All human beings feel good about ourselves when we accomplish something good or hard. Give them chores to make, they love it, and they love to see the results and feel they were helpful. That makes them feel good and happy, and it helps in their behaviour.
5) Lastly, I have used in moments when discipline was difficult, or when they needed to improve a certain aspect, reward charts. I prefer rewards chart rather than punishment. Each get an objective (not the 2 year old though) and they get a star each they they accomplish it. When they get ten stars they get a price (toy that they like, or an outing by themselves with mom/dad).
I hope this helps!