Occasional Contributor
Posts: 6
Registered: ‎11-19-2013
Re: Christmas shopping dilema

Thank you for your input.  And yes, that is pretty much how it is.  Except to make it worse, she kicked him out of the house about 6 years ago, they were separated for 3 1/2 years & almost divorced, then got back together & now he's left her & they're really divorcing.  When they were together originally, she caused problems on quite a few occassions & he was an ass.  While they were separated, he started acting like a normal human being again!  And things were okay for a while when they got back together (although she still stirred up trouble, just not as much or as openly).  Then after my oldest niece turned 13 (she's now 14), they stopped coming to our monthly family dinners for a while because my niece felt her birthday wasn't properly recognized.  Mind you it was recognized the same way everyone else's is, but she though she deserved more because she's the oldest grandchild.  She is raising their children to be entitled brats (for lack of a better term) & my brother is helping/letting her (he's just as much to blame even if it's just for not correcting the problem) and that is what I don't like.  I also know that my oldest niece has told lies to my brother & SIL about me, saying I said horrible things about my SIL in front of her while they were split before.


Also, I was told flat out that I was disowned.  It was the last thing they said to me.  And they told several family members that they would not attend anything that we were invited to, so they would have to choose between us.  


I don't expect anyone to get anything for my kids, and most of my siblings don't buy anything for them (I'm 1 of 8 & currently have 8 nieces & nephews with 1 on the way).  It's not the matter of getting **bleep** for tat that bothers me.  It's the ungratefulness, selfishness, and sense of entitlement that bothers me.  My other nieces and nephews and siblings thank us for the gifts we buy and that is enough for me.  So my children already know that we give gifts without expecting anything in return and that nobody needs to buy them anything.  I also drill it into them to not make any comments like "oh, I already have this"!  We say 'thank you' & 'I love it'.


You've said basically what I feel like I need to do, but really don't want to do...