Regular Contributor
Posts: 213
Registered: ‎08-20-2013
Re: How do you control youself IN THE MOMENT?

Sometimes I have to put myself in time out. And I say to myself over and over I love my kids, I love my kids, I love my kids...


It's HARD. We all lose our cool sometimes. When I do I take that time out moment for myself too. And when we come back together and talk I let my kid know that I was really upset and I am sorry for overreacting by doing x,y,z. It's important for her to see that I feel bad about blowing up and I don't think in any way it gives her an upperhand as long as the actual rules are still firm. I do think it's important for her to see that I don't like to yell and scream and it makes me feel out of control so that she can know that I'm working really hard on controlling myself and also that if she does the same thing, she needs to respect other people and say that she is sorry and take time to cool off too. 


I have noticed that lack of sleep and not eating well inhibits my ability to control my emotions, and if I'm not on top of taking care of myself then I have a much more difficult time. I also have some chronic pain issues that I'm addressing right now and if I'm behind on my pain management it makes it even more difficult for me to be calm yet firm.