07-16-2014 07:39 AM - edited 07-16-2014 07:41 AM
We have tried a chore chart (or task, or responsibility chart, whatever you want to call it) at home during the last school year (kindy) for our daughter. It lasted about a month. With both of us working full time, the couple hours we had before the bedtime routine started was spent doing homework with her (like pulling teeth), cooking and then eating dinner, and also taking care of her younger brother. Doing homework was one of her tasks and somedays she didn't even get that done because of dance class or we ran out of time. There were rewards for this system if she got enough stars at the end of the week. She got to choose the reward at the beginning of the week. She only got the reward for only ONE of the weeks that we had this going.
She just turned 6. She is always trying to "help" by doing things I did not ask her to do, trying to be a 2nd mom to her brother, and generally not listening to anything her parents say. Despite always wanting to help in un-helpful ways, she said didn't want to try to chore chart again. But I have had it up to HERE with her disrespectful ways and want to implement this again to help curb her behavior, especially before she goes into 1st grade. I came up with some "tasks" but really need help with consequences. We need clear cut things that will happen so we don't end up yelling and arguing with her. Her dad and I are at our wits ends!
So the tasks are simple: Make bed, Put away dirty clothes, Put away shoes, Tidy room. And then I added Read a book, Practice Math, Practice Writing. When school starts up, we'll have to probably take the last 2 away and just replace with Do Homework.
Chores not completed = No TV time, No Innotab time and obviously no reward at end of week
Bad Behavior Days at School = No TV time, No Innotab time, write sentences?? (I used to make her do this in VPK)
Disrespectful behavior (not listening, dis-obeying, etc) = Spanking and time out??
I know during school, it was easier if there was an special event coming up or field trip that I would tell her if she had any bad behavior days she would not participate. But what do we do on normal weeks with no special events coming up?
07-16-2014 09:44 AM
07-22-2014 02:59 PM
We take our chore chart system really seriously and keep an exact routine schedule. On days that he is exceptionally stubborn about not following through we don't just take away a few items that he wants he has the option of sitting on the time out stool or doing the chore. He is allowed to get up to do the chore and if he starts playing or ignoring us it's back on the stool. He of course is allowed off for meal time but has to go directly back. He has had days where he thought he was smart and chose to stay on the stool until the next day when he realized it was right back onto the stool until he finished up from yesterday.
I read that it takes about 21 days for something to become a habit. Good luck. I know it's hard to take an activity like dance class away but if she is having such a hard time getting homework done due to dance classes as she ages the demands will only become harder and it might be better to wait until she can manage time and chores better.
07-22-2014 04:21 PM