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Occasional Visitor
sierrahaines12
Posts: 1
Registered: ‎09-25-2013

15 and maybe pregnant

I'm having symtoms of pregnancy  and I'm getting a test tomorrow. I'm only 15 and I'm sure I am what do I do? Like how do I pay for everything? And how woild I deal with kids at school? 

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Super Contributor
LaylasMommy1014
Posts: 331
Registered: ‎06-24-2013

Re: 15 and maybe pregnant

Well, unfortunately 15 is an awful young age, in some states, you can start a job at 15, with parental permission and a "work id" (texas had these, not sure about other states.. most states i believe its parental permission). If you are pregnant, my suggestion may seem harsh, but I would own up and take responsibility. Pay for as much as humanly possible for your age. Get a job, continue going to school and finish school so that you can rise above the statistics and provide a brighter future for your child! :smileyhappy: It is possible and you can do it! I was 24 when my daughter was born and I am in college, it is SUPER hard to do schoolwork/homework and take care of a baby...but it IS possible!! It really is! :smileyhappy:

Talk to your parents, talk to your boyfriend and his parents, try to work together for the child..having a great support system is key. But please, try to take responsibility yourselves and dont let the most of the financial burden fall on the parents. it is your child, you will be a parent.. you need to change yourself, and it will happen fast.  I dont want to sound mean here either, but it is the simple truth and im just throwing it out there.. if you are asking the question of "how will I pay for everything?" and "how would I deal with the kids at school?", its a clue that maybe possibly you need to rethink the whole sex thing.. or at least refrain from sex unless you have or can afford to buy some condoms...or get some birth control. You arent mentally ready to handle a childbirth at 15 or 16, you are still a child yourself ( i know that seems harsh to hear, but science is science :smileysad: ) and have alot of life ahead of you before you should be thinking of babies.

 

Im not sure how you would deal with kids at school.. I was a virgin until i was 20.. by choice :smileyhappy: I guess I would just play it by ear, and try to approach things with a positive attitude and maybe some humor to deflect some negative comments?

 

You do have other options. the A word is not something i will suggest. But the adoption one I will throw out there.

If you dont feel like you could handle the responsibilities of parenthood , or just feel like you "just arent ready"..thats ok as well. There are many people out there who will be willing to adopt a baby.If you feel like you'll never be able to give the child a good life, adoption is an option. But giving up a baby isnt for everyone, just like parenthood isnt. You will have to have some long heart to heart talks with the boyfriend, your parents, and most importantly, yourself. :smileyhappy: I hope some of that helped.

 

My next suggestion is to let your parents know whats going on.. then if you arent pregnant, it will be easier to approach the subject of getting on birth control to prevent any further scares like this :smileyhappy: and they may be more open to that idea at that point as well. 

I hope i've helped and not sounded like an old fashioned witch lol :smileyhappy:

let us know and best of luck to you!

 

♥ Brie ♥
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New Contributor
vfackerman
Posts: 2
Registered: ‎09-25-2013

Re: 15 and maybe pregnant

I'm 18 and pregnant right now. Due in December. Fortunately I graduated high school in May. I'm in college now and it's a bit hard but going well. One of my best friends though had a baby early our senior year and she was still able to complete high school at home. She's in college now too, doing well. The hardest part will be maintaining your grades. Just keep telling yourself that dropping out is not an option. Others have done this before you under worse circumstances and still succeeded. You will have to get a job but be sure to have medical insurance that will cover the baby. And make sure your boyfriend gets a job. As far as the rest goes I'm sure your and his patents will be happy to help out a bit once the baby is born. And when it comes to kids at school and what other people think, you'll have to do your best not to worry about it. Your attitude towards how they think can either make you so much stronger or make you bitter and angry. There will be negative comments but keep in mind that they won't be able to begin to understand what you're going through. And it could happen to any of them. You slip up one time and have sex and your life is changed forever. That's no reason for you to be judged. Just don't think on it and know that your better than what they think. You're responsible for going through with the pregnancy, which shows a lot of character. I hope I could help! Praying for you!
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New Contributor
cjrussell73
Posts: 4
Registered: ‎09-27-2013

Re: 15 and maybe pregnant

having a baby is expensive at any age, but there are  programs out there to help low income mothers. I would suggest talking to your family, dont go through it alone, as far as kids at school, cant say they wont bully you over it, but you get that on alot of things, talk to your teachers, parents, friends...you will get through it

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Occasional Visitor
brengstrand
Posts: 1
Registered: ‎10-26-2013

Re: 15 and maybe pregnant

I had my daughter fresh out of high school. I even attended open campus, which are special classes, in my senior year. Thankfully I was able to get a decent job at an attorney's office and the father and I planned on getting married before the surprise (though it didn't happen until she was almost 2). Now my daughter is five and I have a bachelor's degree that I got in 2.5 years. My husband worked all the time so I had to care for her while I did my school work and a lovely neighbor watched her while I attended classes. I worked really hard for it and now I am under review for jobs at places like the Jones Institute and expecting baby number two. My husband and I are still together and, by the end of December, we will have been together for ten years (married for 4 in July). I worked through everything even despite heart problems and other stressors, but I had to fight. At fifteen, I can guess that you haven't had to fight yet, but that doesn't mean it isn't possible.

A baby is a serious responsibility that, if you choose to keep it, you will have to grow up to raise. It has been a great experience having a daughter when I was still young, but also very challenging. You don't need a support system, but you have to be willing to work without one because this will be hard.

While the words of encouragement from others above are also very true, your friends will also likely desert you because they won't understand why you can no longer drop everything for them. I also wouldn't guarantee that your family will be so supportive (at least mine wasn't but everyone is different). You won't get to go out to bars and get drunk at 21 because, in the back of your mind, you know there is a child that needs you to come home- another thing your friends will not understand. However, at the same time a child is worth every sleepless night and tear (you will cry in frustration eventually!). If you get pregnant and are worried about what other kids think of you, you may not be ready for this kind of commitment, but it is ultimately your decision. Do some research, don't put off anything that can be done today and look out for the future because it's not just yours anymore! If it turns out that you aren't pregnant, you got lucky! Just keep safe and remember that next time may not be so lucky. I hope this bit of wisdom helps and I do wish you all the best, whatever happens.
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