Thursday, January 30th, 2014
I try hard not to think too much about Max’s future. Long ago, I learned that it mostly made me anxious, which did me and Max no good whatsoever. And so I do my best to teach, enable and encourage him, and I hope for the best. Sometimes, though, I wonder about whether he will get married. Given that he’s 11 years old, he’s got plenty of time. (Once, I asked who he’d like to marry, and he answered “Lightning McQueen.”) Still, it’s one of those life happinesses you want for your children, and impossible to ignore.
I saw a video the other day that made me wistful. Vantrease Blair helps run a home for people with disabilities in Orlando. After getting engaged and planning her big day, Blair decided to include seven women from the home in her ceremony. “I wanted to give them the wedding of their dreams and, luckily enough, I married someone who was right on with that and said, ‘Okay, let’s do it!’” she said.
The women picked their white dresses, bouquets, flowers, cakes and wedding albums. Some wore tiaras during the ceremony and some, veils, as they watched Blair take her vows. They all glowed. Afterward, the newlyweds held two receptions: One for themselves, and one for the seven ladies.
Watching the women, you couldn’t help but feel happy for them. And yet, I also felt a bit sad. Were they truly incapable of getting married, even if not in the traditional way? In recent years, I’ve read amazing stories about people with special needs falling in love and marrying, including people with Down syndrome and intellectual disability. As the mother of one bride with cerebral palsy said, “There is no disabled love. There is only true love.”
Words to hope by.
From my other blog:
Image: Screen grab, CNN videoAdd a Comment
Tags: Disability and marriage | Categories: Autism, Cerebral Palsy, Children With Special Needs, Diagnosing ADHD, Disability, Down Syndrome, Health, Must Read, Special Needs, Special Needs Parenting, To The Max