Thursday, July 5th, 2012
Dear Tom and Katie,
I know you’ve got a lot on your minds, so I’ll make this quick: I’d like to thank you for the divorce. I’m not actually wishing you grief, but given that you are splitting up I wanted to tell you that I appreciate it.
You see, back when I first had my son, Max, I didn’t think I’d ever care about celebrity gossip again, or anything fluffy. I didn’t think I’d be happy again. I thought life as I knew it was over. Max had a stroke at birth and doctors told me and my husband grim things about his future: that he might not walk or talk, that he could have vision and hearing problems and be cognitively impaired.
For months, I didn’t do much except cry. Returning to work was a relief, something to take my mind off my grief.
Max progressed, on his own timeline.He was eventually diagnosed with cerebral palsy, and while he has his challenges with speech, using his hands and learning, he is doing so much better than the doctors ever thought he would. He walks well, he’s determined, he’s charming, and he is generally an awesome kid who’s perfect in my eyes.
As the years passed, I stopped grieving about Max. My life became a new kind of normal, and once again I was able to take pleasure in things—occasional mani-pedis, seeing a play with friends, reading magazines. I remember how psyched I was that I still cared about celeb scoop. What happened to my son may have changed me in many ways, but I remained as nosy and curious as every other star gazer.
I was a little worried about Max the other day; he’s been trying so hard to tell me things lately, except his speech isn’t getting any clearer. Then I spent part of my commute gulping down the People article about your breakup, and suddenly I was calmer.
Thank you for the distraction.
I wish you both the best of luck. Remember to put Suri first.
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Tags: break up, breakup, health, Katie Holmes, Tom and Katie update, Tom Cruise, Tomkat divorce | Categories: Autism, Cerebral Palsy, Children With Special Needs, Disability, Down Syndrome, Must Read, SPD, Special Needs, Special Needs Parenting, To The Max