How Hurricane Sandy Reminded Me How Much I Love Being A Mom
This is a post in the weekly Autism Hopes series by Lisa Quinones-Fontanez, a mom who blogs over at AutismWonderland.
Last week I was feeling frustrated, stressed out and overwhelmed by being a mom, a wife, an employee, a graduate student. And I was feeling like I needed an escape. I was grateful for the opportunity to be alone—without the responsibility of answering to anyone. I was grateful to be attending the LATISM Conference and a few days to reconnect with bloggers from all over.
Well, I got a few more days than I bargained for.
I am typing this from someone else’s laptop in a Houston hotel. I was supposed to fly out on Sunday. But because of Hurricane Sandy, my flight was cancelled.
And in that moment, when my flight was cancelled, when I knew I couldn’t get home to be with my son, I realized how much I truly loved being a mom to Norrin.
These last few days, I’ve missed Norrin. It’s a big bad beautiful world. I’ve walked up and down Houston’s streets and it’s been strange. Something has been missing. I’m missing holding a hand. His hand. There are things that I am seeing that I know he would love and it’s hard to enjoy the sights without him.
These last few days, I’ve been glued to the news. It’s been heartbreaking to watch the devastation of Sandy. I would have loved the excuse to switch the channel. I am looking forward to sitting on my sofa with Norrin watching Thomas the Train.
Today is Halloween. It’s been six days since I’ve seen Norrin. I’ve never been away from him this long. And missing Halloween with him is making it tough. We’ve really worked to prepare him. I’m not one for Halloween, but seeing him excited these last few weeks and knowing I can’t be part of that excitement I feel like I am missing out on something special.
I never realized how much I’ve taken Norrin and motherhood for granted.
Being a mom—his mom—is a privilege. It’s tough, it’s overwhelming, it’s stressful. But it’s also fun, inspiring and exciting. And I think it’s something that’s easy to forget in our day-to-day crazy of calls, appointments and laundry.
These last few days have been really hard for me. Being away from my son, my husband, my home during such a difficult time is overwhelming. I know it’s been hard on Norrin. Not really understanding where I’ve been or why I’ve been gone so long is disrupting for him. While it’s been difficult I have to remember they are safe. I am safe. Our home is okay.
Tomorrow—fingers crossed—I get to go home. I get to hug Norrin and tell him how much I love and missed him. Being away from him for so long has been one of the hardest things, but I am grateful that I had this reminder.