Wednesday, March 5th, 2014
I am getting married in October, and almost every time someone asks me what I am doing at any point outside of work hours, I respond, “Working on wedding planning.” After several months of adopting a strict work/wedding schedule, I realized there were some similarities between my world at Parents and the wedding planning world. It turns out that planning a wedding is a whole lot like having a baby. For example, I have 40 weeks to plan my wedding, which is equivalent to a full-term pregnancy. As I type this, my craving for a giant piece of chocolate cake is going through the roof. And the similarities don’t end there. Here are 5 major ways I think planning my wedding is like having a baby.
1. I’m in constant communication with my mom. My mom and I have always been close. When I moved 1,000 miles away, it was a huge adjustment for both of us. The distance between us has become even more real now that I am (or, I should say, we are) planning this wedding. We call, text, email, mail, and even share Google documents. I used to say that I couldn’t imagine how much I would rely on my mom for guidance when I had a baby, but I think that wedding planning has given me a nice preview. Thank goodness for technology!
2. Strangers hand out unsolicited advice regularly. It is surprising how frequently complete strangers give me unwanted tips on how to plan my wedding. I enjoy when friends or coworkers check in on my wedding progress from time to time, but I have no interest in hearing Jane Doe’s thoughts on flower arrangements while I’m trying to read on the bus. I’ve learned about the dangers of not having a videographer and the importance of losing weight before the wedding. Now I know how pregnant women must feel on a day-to-day basis when their peaceful commute or errands run is interrupted with baby advice. Plus, a bump is even more noticeable than a ring.
3. I’m always worried I’m doing something wrong. Sometimes, the internet is not your friend. I learned this yet again the other night. In the back of my head, I knew it was okay that I hadn’t booked a band yet because having a wedding in Nashville means that there are more music options than I’ll ever need. But a wedding website insisted that I should have already booked the entertainment. I allegedly risked having no music at my wedding. Against my better judgment, I drafted a middle-of-the-night email to the venue asking them for recommendations ASAP. I feel like a first-time mom-to-be who calls the doctor constantly with problems that aren’t really problems.
4. Blending religions is hard. Today, it is not uncommon to have an interfaith marriage. However, that doesn’t mean that planning one is easy. I am Jewish and my fiancé is Catholic. Everyone has a different opinion on how a Jewish-Catholic wedding should happen, and there is no way to make everyone happy. And, if people have an opinion about our Jewish-Catholic wedding, they are definitely going to have a stronger opinion about raising any future Jewish-Catholic babies. Self, you’ve been warned.
5. In the end, it’s all worth it. I may be on an emotional roller coaster for the greater part of this year, similar to the ups and downs of pregnancy, but after all this is done, I will have gained something new and wonderful — a husband, a partner for the rest of my life, just as moms will have gained a newborn baby (or babies). All this for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health — an amazing feeling.
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