Reality Star Bethenny Frankel Talks About Miscarriage

Today is one of those days that I’m going to go off-topic. As many of you know, I’m’s Pregnancy Editor, so occasionally I write about pregnancy-related topics that catch my eye, usually a story in the news. My next post will be about food and nutrition–I promise!

I think pregnancy is magical, exciting, terrifying, and, for some people, difficult. I remember my fear of miscarrying when I was pregnant with Mason, and so I was incredibly touched when Bethenny Frankel bravely revealed on the Today Show this morning that she had suffered a recent miscarriage at eight-weeks-pregnant.  My heart broke for her as she shared her anguish with host Savannah Guthrie. The 41-year-old admitted that she’s still struggling to make sense of the devastating loss. I’m sure, for her, it’s even more difficult because people are constantly asking her when she’s going to have another baby–and while they’re interviewing her on camera, no less.

Like many women today, Bethenny established her career before she got married and had a baby. Her adorable daughter Brynn is 21-months-old–and she had said previously that she wouldn’t be able to wait long if she wanted a second baby due to her advanced maternal age. I hope with all my heart that this miscarriage is an isolated incident and she goes on to become pregnant again with a healthy baby. But the reality is that it’s much harder to become pregnant in your 40s than it is in your 20s. It’s easy to forget that there is a time stamp on our fertility, particularly in New York City, where Bethenny and I live; it seems like everyone here waits until they’re older to have a baby.

I’m incredibly lucky to have never suffered a miscarriage (knock on wood). However, I think and sometimes worry about my fertility all the time (my mother would call it “borrowing trouble”). Blame it on my day job–I’ve edited quite a few pieces on infertility. I’m also just months away from my 35th birthday, and after 35 there are increased risks in pregnancy. I’m not a millionaire TV star, but  I did delay having a baby until I was in my early 30s so that I could get to a certain point in my career first. If I do face secondary fertility, I’d like to think that I’ll be as gracious as Bethenny and be grateful for the baby I have instead of fearful that I may never have another. Do you ever think about secondary infertility, or have you struggled with infertility in your life?

Photo: Bethenny Frankel at the American premiere of “Couples Retreat” at Mann’s Village Theatre, Westwood via Featureflash/

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  1. by Ann

    On February 20, 2012 at 7:49 pm

    In was 38 when John was born. We had no problems with conception. We joked we might as well of been teenagers at prom, it happened so fast. The second time we conceived was quick as well, but the embryo died at eight weeks. Seems to be the magic number nowadays. I think before sensitive EPTs, women just thought the missed a cycle, because it was just like my period started again. We are going to try again!

  2. by Heather Morgan Shott

    On February 20, 2012 at 8:20 pm

    I’m so sorry, Ann. Very best wishes to you!

  3. by RedTx

    On February 21, 2012 at 10:55 am

    Having a miscarriage is a traumatic event for anyone. Having suffered one myself, I remember the myriad of emotions that I went through, especially after finally conceiving in the midst of infertility. Knowing all that, I would have loved if this article had been written by someone who could relate with more than sympathy – perhaps empathy – to this traumatic event.

  4. by Jen amburn

    On February 21, 2012 at 7:28 pm

    I suffered first from infertility at 30 and then a miscarriage at 32. When I got pregnant again, I can’t explain all the feelings of fear, guilt, happiness and more fear. My heart breaks for anyone who has to go through it.

  5. by Jennifer Kuzera

    On February 21, 2012 at 7:30 pm

    I have suffered 3 miscarriages and they are traumatic and emotionally painful. I, too, will be 35 in a couple of months. My deepest sympathy to Bethenny and her family during this difficult time.

  6. by Tara

    On February 21, 2012 at 8:56 pm

    We’ve been dealing with secondary infertility for several years. We’ve basically given up and are happy with one now. Luckily I never had a miscarriage but I couldn’t imagine the pain of dealing with it on camera.

  7. by sunshine gibby

    On February 22, 2012 at 6:40 am

    I am only 29 I have been pregnant 5 times and have 2 children. It is terrifying and gut wrenching at any age to loose a pregnancy. My heart hurts for Ms Frankel. I hope she keeps her faith and knows she isnt alone.

  8. by Laura

    On February 22, 2012 at 10:59 am

    I was older(38)when I conceived my daughter and had no problems gettting pregnant. But the second time around we are dealing with second fertility and are almost out of options. I am trying to be gratefulfor the one child I have and think if I could have another it would be a blessing! It is hard but a lot of people aren’t blessed with even one!

  9. by Tara

    On February 23, 2012 at 5:56 pm

    It’s sad that she had to suffer a loss, and I agree that being constantly asked about it would make the pain worse.

    I am fortunate and thankful that we were able to get pregnant the usual way without too much trouble.