Posts Tagged ‘ bumpalicious ’

Super No No’s or Don’ts for Maternity Photos

Thursday, December 6th, 2012

Let’s get something straight. I believe in documenting pregnancy. ALL of it. Like the fact that I’ve cried every day this week. About nothing. Hello third trimester hormones, you’re obviously bunking with me.

In that same spirit of documentation, I believe in photographing the pregnant bod. I’ve done a total crap shoot of a job of it this pregnancy, but that doesn’t mean I don’t tout the importance of remembering the incredible act of growing a baby. Whether a professional, your shorty, or the bathroom mirror helps you photograph, take at least a few of this once-in-a-lifetime experience.

I know many a woman who doesn’t want a camera near her for 9 months, but I think it’s a treasure to share with your child. Also, how can you deliver a convincing dose of guilt regarding the sacrifice it was to birth the little hooligan when they’re being an entitled teenager unless you give them documented proof of your belly so large it defines the laws of gravity and rips through every shirt that dares to cover it?

Maternity photos are a relatively newish trend. It wasn’t common during my mother’s child bearing years to have a professional photographer snap the bump. Now, it’s common place. We took them with our first and I’m hoping to find time to do it with this pregnancy as well.

The number one DO for maternity photos is do what makes you happy. If you’re happy, you’ll look beautiful and love them, and that’s what matters. If it makes you happy to take naked nudie pictures on the beach with an “artistically” finger-painted bump courtesy of your toddler while your husband stands awkwardly clear of center stage giving an overly enthusiastic thumbs up, then do it. It doesn’t matter what haters like myself think.

Honestly, I’ve seen a lot of beautiful ideas for maternity photos on the Internets, and while most of them are sweet, a few out there need a little…editing. Or a lot. Or a serious “Just Say No” campaign.

Let me offer (and probably offend) some unsolicited tips to keep your pregnancy pictures off awkwardfamilyphotos.com (a gem of a website). Remember, the point is to celebrate the belly, not scar future generations with your uh, creative ideas.

This Lady’s Take on Super No No’s or Don’ts for Maternity Photos

1. Go Nudie with Your Partner. I’m going on record and saying couple’s nudity is not for pregnancy photos. No one wants any reminders of how your baby was conceived.

2. Wear Costumes. Dressing the belly up for Halloween is one thing. To remember yourself as a maternally glowing Bozo the Clown? Hard to pull off.

3. Be the Overly Supportive Partner. See reference to number one, but I’m not sure why a man needs to be shirtless in a pregnancy pic. It screams belly envy and over compensating by baring their pectoralis major. Nobody’s breasts should be the star of the shoot.

4. Draw on the Belly. Everyone knows there’s a baby in there. Drawing a fetus on your belly is overkill. And creepy.

5. Look like a Creepin’ Impregnater. If you want your significant other in the picture, put them in the picture. His leering in the background doesn’t send quite the right “supportive” vibe.

6. Compare Bellies. There’s a beautiful reason you’re the size of a house, what’s his beautiful excuse?

7. Use Guns as a Prop. Maybe it’s just my own hangup, but something about babies and guns just doesn’t mix for me.

8. Look Uncomfortable. I’m fully aware it’s difficult to look like like the most comfortable lass when you’re nine months deep, but set yourself up for success I say. Pick poses that work with pregnancy. I’ve never seen them supermodels pull off the pregnant lady reclines in tree pose. If the professionals can’t do it, maybe the rest of us shouldn’t either.

Shoot girl, you know I know that sometimes it’s hard to feel beautiful while pregnant, but I think if you steer clear of the above list, you’ll be taking a step in the right direction. Okay really, you’ll be taking one giant leap for pregnancy-kind.

Image: Yours truly working the awkward “peeping bump” pose

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Back in the (Pregnancy) Saddle Again

Monday, September 17th, 2012

I am a little over 19 weeks pregnant.

But let’s just say 20 weeks since it’s a nice even number and it’s my pregnancy and I’ll round up if I want to. I believe that translates to 4, nearly 5 months pregnant for those who don’t speak weeks (read: me). Let’s be honest, all the weeks, months, trimesters, etc., are just a tad bit confusing. I remember learning pregnancy, depending on how you count it, is considered 10 months by some. My response? Slow your roll please.  Don’t rock my newly mushy pregnant brain. I can’t handle the truth.

What I do need to know, and can handle remembering is the fact that our second baby is due February 12th, just in time to be our valentine. We are over the moon about expanding our family.

I’m very happily 27 and pregnant…again. I’m discovering a second pregnancy is a little like déjà vu. The rosier aspects of pregnancy feel dreamy and familiar, but hard to place exactly on a timeline next to my first pregnancy. When did the baby move again? When did my belly pop? When were skinny jeans no longer looking so skinny? But then there are the symptoms of irrefutable force that were never forgotten. Oh yes, I remember you toilet, my foe. Hemorrhoids? We’ve never parted. Gas? Let’s just say if there was a way to harness all the “natural gas” I’m expelling, there’d be no talk of alternative fuel sources.

Hailing from Arizona, I’m delighted to spend the majority of my pregnancy in the cooler redemptive season, as opposed to the infernal and eternal summer season in which I want to give the weatherman the bird every day.  I also recently quit my part-time teaching gig to spend the days wrangling, singing, dancing, and talking Disney princess at length with our 2-year-old daughter. I do not take myself too seriously, but I do take remembering the ups and downs of pregnancy and motherhood seriously. I’m looking forward to chronicling all of the shenanigans of this pregnancy and my growing lovely lady bump.

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