Posts Tagged ‘ stepchildren ’

A Look at 5 Stepfamilies in Hollywood

Thursday, August 23rd, 2012

This post was written by our friends at Celebrity Baby Scoop.

There are millions of stepfamilies across the nation.

So it’s no wonder that Hollywood has its fair share of blended families. From LeAnn Rimes and Eddie Cibrian’s crew, to Gisele Bündchen and Tom Brady’s bunch, let’s take a look at 5 stepfamilies in Tinseltown.

Megan Fox & Brian Austin Green

Hot Hollywood couple Megan Fox and Brian Austin Green are getting ready to welcome a sibling for Brian’s 10-year-old son Kassius later this year.

The Beverly Hills, 90210 star said that his wife is an amazing stepmother to his son, whom he welcomed with ex Vanessa Marcil in March 2002.

“She is absolutely my better half in parenting,” Green said. “She just gets it. It’s instinctual for her. She loves my son, Kassius. And from the time we started dating – you know, she was 18 – she stepped in and took control. It’s unbelievable. At 18, I was like, ‘Hey, which club is open tonight? And how cool do my pants look? Can I sneak a drink across the bar without getting caught?’”

Sara Evans & Jay Barker

Country crooner Sara Evans has her hands full with a blended family of 7 children with husband Jay Barker.

The Anywhere singer opened up to Celebrity Baby Scoop about staying organized in their large family.

“It’s definitely a lot to keep track of [laughs]!,” she said. “I try to stay super organized with my schedule. My work schedule is crazy by itself, but when you add in 7 kids and their school activities, sports, Jay’s work, etc., it can be nuts. I have a calendar that I keep with me almost all the time to just stay on top of it all.”

So any chance for baby No. 8?

“We’ve definitely talked about it and would love to have a child together at some point,” she said. “Right now we’re so busy with 7 kids though!”

Anna Paquin & Stephen Moyer

Anna Paquin and her True Blood costar husband Stephen Moyer are getting ready to welcome twins this fall.

And they’ll be adding to the brood! Anna is stepmom to Stephen’s two children – daughter Lilac, 10, and son Billy, 12 – from previous relationships.

“I love my kids beyond anything,” Stephen recently said. “They’re the best things ever, and having two more is just going to be even more crazy, but that’s cool!”

(more…)

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Underappreciated

Monday, September 27th, 2010

That’s often a big part of what it feels like to be a stepmother, says Rachelle Katz, author of The Happy Stepmother. “It can be one of the most challenging roles in society,” she explains, “and it often receives little support and understanding from others.” Katz is a psychotherapist in private practice in New York City, and runs monthly stepmother support groups. She also is the mother to a stepdaughter. Knowing how many of you out there have your own stepchildren and blended families, I asked Katz:. If she had to name five things stepmoms shouldn‘t do, what would they be? Her answers drive home just how complex this role and relationship is, and how much effort it can take for everyone in the family to feel comfortable. This is her list.

1. Don’t overdo it

It’s easier to develop caring, loving, and friendly relationships with stepchildren when you’re not taking on parental responsibilities. As much as you can, let your husband take on the bulk of the true parenting stuff, and concentrate on spending quality time with the kids and interacting with them in meaningful, pleasurable ways.

2. Don’t discipline your stepchildren

Mental health experts generally agree that, at least in the first few years of remarriage, disciplining stepchildren should be left to the biological parents. Stepchildren need time to bond with stepparents, to learn to trust and accept them, before they can view them as authority figures. Stepmothers should operate more as a babysitters or aunts than as parents. You might say, “This is the rule of the house: Homework is done before television.” If your stepchild counters, “You’re not my parent!” you can respond with, “Yes, you’re right. You have a mom and a dad, and I’m not going to replace either one of them. Meanwhile, I’m the adult in charge here tonight, and the rule is no television until homework is done.”

3. Don’t yell at your stepchildren

Remember that it is inappropriate to criticize, put down, raise your voice, or be cruel in any way to your stepchildren – no matter how much they may seem to misbehave or aggravate you. (While it’s equally inappropriate to yell at your biological children, there’s usually a stronger foundation of love that may enable them to tolerate and overlook an occasional angry outburst on your part.) If you find yourself lashing out at your stepchildren, apologize immediately. This doesn’t mean you’re condoning their misbehavior; you’re simply taking responsibility for your own behavior. An apology is a sign of respect and an indication that you care about your stepchildren and your relationship with them.

4. Don’t ever say anything critical about your stepchildren’s mother

Even if your criticism of her is accurate and justified, it will only hurt your stepchildren to know how you feel. The resentment this might produce could last for years, regardless of all the wonderful things you do for them.

5. Don’t encourage your stepchildren to call you Mommy

Some stepmothers, particularly those with full-time custody of their stepchildren, perceive themselves as their stepchildren’s “true” mothers. But even then it’s inappropriate for her to ask her stepchildren to call her Mommy. Stepchildren who have limited relationships with their mother still maintain a strong sense of loyalty, and probably harbor the hope of developing a better relationship with her in the future. Young stepchildren, as a sign of affection and respect, may be most likely to call you Mommy. If yours does this, gently correct him by saying that you love him very much, but he has a mommy who also loves him very much. You know he loves you, and it’s okay if he calls you by your first name. (If this is too casual for your taste, have your stepchild add Miss in front of your name.)

All you stepmothers out there: What do you find to be the biggest challenge?

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