New Study: Working Parents Too Stressed to Have Sex

ss_101704105Do working parents have more stress in their lives than non-working parents? While it’s clear that being a stay-at-home mom or dad is certainly no walk in the park, a new national survey from Care.com implies the answer is ”yes.”

 According to the survey, sixty-two percent of working parents revealed they are too stressed from managing their jobs and families to go to the gym, call a friend, or even have sex with their spouses. 

Another key finding? The majority of those surveyed would be willing to trade in a higher paycheck for less responsibility at work. A quarter of working parents (25%) reported that they would leave their current jobs for less or considerably less money if that would provide more flexibility in their lives.

Results go on to show the issue of childcare as a major stress-inducer. With more than a third (34%) of parents relying on their nannies or babysitters to make their lives run smoothly, 62% find that it is stressful to extremely stressful when a childcare crisis, such as a sick nanny or babysitter or a school closing occurs.  And while more than half (58%) of parents have a childcare back-up plan, only ten percent rely on their employers to provide emergency back-up care as a benefit.

Still, the greatest source of stress for the working parents proved to be the difficult task of managing work-life balance.  More than a third of parents – (35 percent) cited work-life as most stressful while a quarter of parents (24%) felt that finding a trusted care provider for their child is more stressful than keeping their relationship with their spouse happy (18.4%) and excelling at their jobs (11.3%).

“While the White House recently announced the great strides of women in the workplace, this survey shows that the work-life balance for so many working parents remains elusive,” said Wendy Sachs, Editor-in-Chief of Care.com.

 “This survey finds that despite successful careers, our work is impacting our personal lives in unhealthy ways.  Working moms, particularly those with young children, are exhausted and stressed by a workday that for many never ends because we are tethered to technology 24/7,” Sachs said.   “It’s no surprise that moms who are toting buzzing BlackBerries in their bags chock full of work emails, can feel tapped out and not eager for sex. Stress kills the libido.”  

What are your thoughts on this survey? Share your opinions along with the biggest sources of stress in your life and how they relate to being a working or stay-at-home parent (SAHP’s should also be considered a ‘working parents’ in my opinion!). 

Note: The Care.com survey was conducted via an online survey at Care.com among 600 adult parents 18 years of age from February 22 – March 1, 2011.

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  1. by Danielle

    On March 23, 2011 at 4:47 pm

    This couldn’t be more true for me! I have two kids under the age of three. Every morning I drop them off at daycare and then commute an hour to work on the bus. I reverse the trip in the evening. When we all finally get home, it is basically dinner, bath, bed. We only have about half an hour each day to play! Then on the weekends we try to catch up on laundry and everything else we’ve neglected all week. My biggest stress is finding time to do everything, especially spending any time with my husband.

  2. by Kate

    On March 23, 2011 at 9:15 pm

    I couldn’t agree more. Every single day is a struggle in terms of work-life balance. My demanding job and demands as a parent to a preschooler have me trying to find time to merely shower and do the things that most people take for granted. It’s brutal.

    If I didn’t need the money so much, I’d ditch my “great” career and just work part time and/or at a job that doesn’t require so much.

  3. by Jada

    On March 23, 2011 at 10:32 pm

    This article is right on point. I am a first time mother and right now, I am still on maternity leave. I decided to take the max amount of time allowed by my company (16 weeks) for the birth of a child. My husband is out of the country working right now & as much as I miss his companionship, sex is the furthest thing from my mind; socializing with friends is even further. I’m lucky to make it out of the house on time when I need to. I can only imagine how life is going to be when I return to work in a few weeks. Luckily my husband will be back before then.

  4. by Dawn

    On March 28, 2011 at 10:28 pm

    How ironic that I am reading this at 10:30 at night after a day where I too wonder if our lifestyle of a 2 career family is worth it. We have a one year old and 3 year old who are at 2 different day care places because one did not have space for my youngest so I have 2 day care drop offs in the morning (plus my husband if it is raining) before going to work. While I finished my master’s last year when my 2nd child was 3 months old, my husband goes to school 2 nights a week plus all day Saturday to get his advanced degree. Why? So we will remain competitive in today’s job market and get even more stressful jobs leaving us with even less time for our families! Seriously, we are on the edge – I just hope we can make it through the next few months and try to get to the point where we can try and be a normal family.
    Until then, I run home every day like a lunatic to try and start dinner, get the kids clothes out, throw in laundry, go through the mail and feed the cats before picking the kids up so I can relax on the weekends. Not sure how long I want to keep this pace up.

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