Monday, October 1st, 2012
Emmett’s music class makes me barf. Not literally, but I seriously hate it. Why? With Fia, all we did were Mommy and Me classes, including music. Perhaps it’s the teacher. Or the sticks banging on a hardwood floor, jarring all my senses. Or maybe it’s the fact that the teacher keeps saying, “When your child starts to make their first noises, like lalala, that proves Music Together is working. They are vocalizing what they hear from the class. That’s why it’s so important to listen to this music at home.”
Are you f-cking kidding me? Homework from a baby music class? Attributing first sounds to the world’s most annoying CD? I think when Emmett coos and laaas he is simply developing language skills that happen um, normally. Who in their right minds listens to this sh-t at home anyway? Okay, I’ll admit on our mom-kids getaway last week it was the only CD in the car. And Teddy and Fia were whining so we put it on. But it was STILL IN THE WRAPPING PAPER!!! BECAUSE I HAD NO INTENTION OF EVER LISTENING TO IT!!! (By the end of the drive I was ready to shoot myself.)
Maybe I’m just having an off-day, but I’m not sure I can take another class. Twirling a scarf around while trying to get my groove on with Emmett at eleven o’clock in the morning is just not fun. I suck at dancing anyway. Unless I’m drinking. Then I think I’m really good.
This is the difference between your first and second kid. The first time around you’re looking for connections with other moms. You’re also looking at how to get through the day. With number two, you’ve already got it down. I don’t need any more mom friends. I’ve got my posse and between our Failure Hours and beach trips, my calendar is full and our club is closed.
Maybe instead of class I should park myself next door at the taco stand, eat my burrito and have him laugh at the Spanish music blaring. I won’t leave with a headache from excruciating songs in my head. Plus, for $5 it’s a much better deal. And god willing, it won’t make me barf.