Posts Tagged ‘ Lee Goldberg ’

Why Fall Foliage is Killing Me! Need Help!

Thursday, September 22nd, 2011

This picture makes me want to sneeze

This picture makes me want to sneeze

Fall sucks. And it sucks that I think this season sucks. It’s not by choice. I would absolutely love it–the way the air turns crisp and the leaves turn vibrant. But sadly, I hate it right now. I think I’m the only New Yorker who is not enjoying this amazing weather.  I watch Lee Goldberg hoping he’ll say those magical words “the first freeze.”

It’s all because of my horrendous allergies. My face looks like a Staypuff marshmallow. My eyes look like I’m a drug addict in withdrawal. I’m 5 months pregnant and limited on what meds I can take. I get shots, so I wasn’t expecting this season to hit me like it has. I have tried the sinus rinse pots and my nose is so stuffed, the water has nowhere to go. So it just goes into my head and gives me a massive headache (it’s as if I sniffed water up my nose while swimming. Am I doing it wrong?) My throat is so itchy; it wakes me up in the night. Why can’t Xanax be a class A pregnancy drug? Then I could just make myself fall asleep and not know what is happening within my sinuses.

I’m now taking Zyrtec and am about to buy Benadryl.  So far everything else I’ve tried (Claritin, Chlor-Trimeton, Qdryl) isn’t helping. Does anyone out there have any suggestions that will give me immediate relief? (I dig homeopathic suggestions, but not in this case where it will take months to build up and work. I want instant results).

I’m making my husband close up all the windows at night. He is rightly annoyed, but it’s either that or my nose blowing like a trumpet in his ear while he’s trying to fall asleep. I seriously fear my nose is going to fall off my face and my eyes are going to swell shut. Help!

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The Elmo Obsession

Friday, June 17th, 2011

Okay, what the f–k is the deal with Elmo?

I’ve put on television before. Besides our mutual love of Lee Goldberg, she really has shown no interest in it. But then, a few weeks ago, I decided to put on Sesame Street. Within seconds I had a full-fledged addict on my hands. I used to have to drag her outside to get away from Wayne Sanchez. She became obsessed with his tail and he in turn, became obsessed with using his claws….on her.  Now I have to leave because of that furry red thing. She’ll stand there pointing, begging for me to turn on the TV.  She’ll whine, then wail, then flop on the floor kicking. I try to distract her with books, toys, even Wayne. Nothing works. Not only that, but now every word in her vocabulary is replaced with that annoying four letter one. She just learned “elbow.” I kept hoping she was just practicing that. But who points to a turned off TV, shrieks and flails because of a body part?

The Elmo Obsession

Now if this were a character created by Disney, I would absolutely insist there is some sort of creepy conspiracy. However, it’s PBS. Nevertheless, there are surely conspiracy theorists out there who think Elmo is programmed deep inside the US government to make our children, well, I don’t know. Something. Because this addiction is just downright weird.

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