My Embarrassing New Year’s Confession

Cynthia Roelle, mom to a 2-year-old daughter and award-winning photographer, shares a New Year’s confession … about her underwear! Read Cynthia’s guest blog every other Wednesday.

Screw the resolution, this year I thought I’d start off with a New Year’s confession. My underwear is 50 shades of gray. I’m not talking S&M or anything remotely approaching the realm of erotica. I’m talking about the saddest assortment of shabby panties you’ve ever seen (or could imagine).

Like any woman I’ve always had my A and B sets of underwear. The former was reserved for special occasions; the latter for everyday wear. They were all quite attractive and not a pair in the drawer was gray.

But over the years (yes, years) my once-pretty panties have practically disintegrated. Every last pair has become stretched and faded and frayed. I’ve literally worn them to dull, shapeless shreds of material.

The situation reached this drab state because I couldn’t bring myself to buy bigger underpants. Granny panties, blech.

Just when I thought my underwear situation couldn’t get any worse, I started losing weight. As it turns out, elastic doesn’t zip back into shape after you’ve stretched it beyond all reason for three years. Add saggy and baggy to 50 shades of gray and you don’t get a pretty picture.

At long last, I decided it was time to spring for new underpants. Undies with springy, fully-functioning elastic. After all, I’m down 20+ pounds (a Christmas miracle!) and I’m thrilled about it.

So, I’m starting 2013 with only a few pounds left to lose and a drawer full of pretty, new undies. We’re not talking Victoria’s Secret here but still, they’re nice. I’m so happy.

I didn’t want to offend anyone with a picture of my underwear (old or new) so instead I included a picture from New Years Eve—first night out with my new underwear! (and a new dress to boot!)

What’s your New Year’s confession?

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  1. by Linda

    On January 2, 2013 at 10:40 am

    Hahahahahahahaha. I know just what you are talking about. I do a lot of praying for safe travels – not because I fear pain (although I do) or paralysis (although I do) or want to live on to see my children grow up (although I do), but because my underwear has holes in it! I’m not abiding by my mom’s advice to always wear nice underwear in case you get in a wreck. I’m down 18 pounds, with many more to go, so I definitely don’t want to buy any new underwear yet, so I’m just wearing the holey, stretched-out stuff for now.

  2. by Kim

    On January 2, 2013 at 2:51 pm

    I was the same way, stayed the same size for 3 years. Got down to 1 size from my high school size and my husband sent me shopping. My panties, and pants, wouldn`t stay up on their own and bras no longer lifted. 4 hours and 200 dollars later I was a VERY happy camper!