Yesterday Mommy and I took you to your first Easter egg hunt of the year. You insisted on wearing a hat you outgrew several months ago: We let you win that battle.
During the drive there, I prepped you:
“Listen son, when the egg hunt begins, you need to pick up as many eggs as you can and drop them in your basket. Don’t stop to take the time to open the eggs to see what’s inside- there will be time for that later. Just find an area where no other kids are looking and search there for the eggs.”
The whistle blew and you were confused at first by the hysteria; you had the extra challenge of competing with 3 year-olds because we couldn’t find the 2 year-olds’ section.
But then, it was if you immediately remembered what I told you.
I saw this clever smile appear on your face… then you ran to a section in the grass where no one else considered going.
You meant business. Sure, it was fun for you, but you knew that when it was all over, each one of those eggs symbolized a chocolate treat which we normally wouldn’t let you eat.
After all the eggs were found, I couldn’t help but privately compare the number of eggs you had in your basket to the other kids’ baskets.
Son, you smoked ‘em. You did exactly as I instructed you in the car ride there.
You seized the opportunity, capitalizing in the free market of the egg hunt.
Granted, Mommy and I aren’t letting you keep all the candy you found. We sorted through what we would let you keep and we’re actually giving 75% of it away to your friends at daycare.
As your Libertarian dad, I am proud of you for learning a real-life lesson yesterday; in regards to being a responsible and proactive participant in the free market.
You worked hard and reaped the fruits of labor, but you’re also giving back to the community of toddlers who weren’t as fortunate to find as many eggs as you did.
In fact, as a health nut and vegetarian, if I had to choose between smoking a half a pack of cigarettes a day versus drinking a 16 ounce soda, I would have a very difficult time in deciding which way to wreck my health.
Drinking “sugary drinks” like soda, chocolate milk, sweet tea, and even fruit juice, as compared to actually eating the fruit itself, is not good.
However, regularly drinking sugary drinks and soda is definitely more socially accepted than smoking cigarettes. (That makes it okay, right?)
We’re so culturally aware of the long-term health risks of tobacco use, but when it comes to junk food and processed foods, sometimes we need a reminder that it’s more than just that those things “make us get fat.”
Either way, I want to live in country where people have the freedom to make those bad decisions for themselves. Not just in New York City, but in every city.
It shouldn’t be the government’s job to “ban” junk food.
That’s my job:
I choose to ban “sugary drinks” in my own life, and just as important, in my young son’s life as well. I take responsibility for myself and my family.
Sure, I agree that America is experiencing an obesity epidemic and we need to do something about it.
But the “we” I’m referring to is not the government. The “we” is us.
For more intriguing pictures showing how much sugar is in drinks and food, go the awesome website they came from:
For the most part, reality TV shows sort of disgust me. I think it’s fair to say that many of them position the viewer to make a judgment call on the show’s participants, dubbing the cast of characters as a collection of village idiots.
In TLC’s Sister Wives, a fundamentalist Mormon, Kody Brown, along with his 4 wives and 17 children, attempt to show the world that despite their untraditional (and unpopular) choice of lifestyle, they’re really not that different after all.
That sounds like the perfect formula for a reality TV show where we “normal people” again get to enjoy the guilty pleasure of gawking at the far less ordinary.
But the truth is, Sister Wives is actually a very redeeming TV show, if I do say so myself. I don’t look down on the Brown family at all. In fact, in many ways, I admire them.
It’s difficult not to have compassion for a man who works very hard to support his wife and kids, multiplied times 4, and makes great efforts to show all of them through his actions and words that he loves them.
I also can’t help but notice that the children actually seem to like each other. The bond between them and the way they care for each other is something I find refreshing on a TV show featuring a family.
Perhaps the best part of Sister Wives is its subtle Libertarian message. Much of the show’s 2nd season is based around the fact that the city of Lehi, and eventually the state of Utah, begin flexing their muscles and baring their teeth at the Brown family; intimidating them from a legal standpoint.
As Kody Brown explains, throughout American history it has not been uncommon for the children of polygamist families to be split up and displaced, while their parents are incarcerated. After all, polygamy (plural marriage) is illegal in our country.
So the family moves to Las Vegas, where their lifestyle is much more accepted and much less of a legal threat as it is in the rest of America.
I’m assuming that most of us don’t morally endorse polygamy. But that’s far from the point.
After making it through the first two seasons of Sister Wives, you can’t help but ask yourself:
Which is worse: For a hard-working man to legally marry his first wife, then “illegally” marry 3 more, or for the state to split up this family over their consensual civil unions?
Either way, why is it our government’s job to get in the middle of that? (Remember the plot of Braveheart? I bet the first time I watched that movie is when the seed was planted in my brain to eventually become a Ron Paul supporter.)
In the case of the Brown family, their fundamentalist Mormon beliefs teach them they are pleasing God by their lifestyle. I’m having trouble seeing how their polygamist lifestyle is actually hurting anyone else.
(Obviously, we as America don’t seem to be too much against Sister Wives because we keep making it a popular show on TLC.)
Why can’t the Brown family be allowed to practice their religion, and therefore their lifestyle, without the hassle of government intervention?
Is it because kids are involved? Are we fearful that the Brown kids are being brainwashed and won’t be able to make their own decisions as adults on whether or not to continue being polygamists? Should that itself be a crime?
I say what matters more is not that a child has one dad and one mom.
What matters is that a child is raised knowing they are loved and believed in by those who raise them.
And for the record, my favorite sister wife on the show is Christine.
There’s that token “I’m holding my kid for the first time” picture on Facebook that automatically gets like 53 comments and “likes.” I know, because here’s my version of that picture posted 20 months ago.
Months later arrives the anger resulting after someone pulls you aside and tells you that it’s normal for an infant to start sleeping through the night at 3 months old and that “crying it out” is just a natural part of it.
“You mean all three of us could have been getting sleep this whole time?!”
I add him to my current list of man crushes: Ron Paul, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, and Bruce Springsteen.
What really propelled me into this state of fatherhood nirvana was probably this past weekend.
There was nothing monumental about it: We took Jack to swim lessons, and on a wagon ride, and just hung out a lot with him.
But the whole time, he was cool. Not high maintenance, not needy in an annoying way, just chillaxed like Jack Johnson.
Sure, it’s easier to feel good about myself as a dad when my kid behaves well the entire weekend. But his 48 hours of perfect behavior which allowed our family to have fun and stay in good moods was largely a result of my diligence with him.
I love to see those moments of “it paid off!” in parenting.
What topped off this perfect weekend was when my wife handed him over to me to put him to bed for the night. He ran right up to my face as if he was going to awkwardly kiss me like Paul Rudd or something.
Instead, he gave me an “Eskimo kiss.” (My wife has been working on teaching him to do that.)
I can’t explain it. But that somehow melted my heart… but in the most manliest of ways, of course.
I don’t feel threatened by how the government defines marriage because I firmly believe in the importance of separating church and state.
Do certain conservative believers in the Christian god have exclusiveness over the right to marriage, as recognized by the American government?
If so, then it’s time to start converting any non-Christian couples before they wed.
There is marriage as recognized by the nation I am a citizen of; then there is marriage as recognized by the particular religious faith I belong to.
Two separate things… and the first one is not something I’m too concerned with.
Though it makes me feel good that my wife took my last name.
It’s actually pretty funny to me when the same people who complain about the Ten Commandments not being displayed in government buildings can not even name all ten of the commandments.
And I always think it’s ridiculous when I hear that “they took prayer out of schools.” No. No they didn’t.
(I’m assuming “they” is referring to Communists and this is the year 1985?)
As the dad of a toddler and the husband of a Christian woman, I pray while holding them both each morning before we go our separate ways for the day. When my son Jack goes to his daycare, I don’t expect them to have prayer for him there.
If I want to teach my son to pray or to learn the Ten Commandments, then it’s my responsibility as his dad to teach him in my home.
I laughed pretty hard recently when I heard a guy complaining about the Presidential support of “legalizing gay marriage,” saying that it threatens the sanctity of marriage and the future of America.
The most obvious reason his viewpoint was invalid is because he unashamedly admits to watching pornography regularly and says there’s nothing wrong with flirting with other women in bars because at the end of the night he’s not going home with them, he’s going home to his wife.
Here’s what I know:
I’m protecting the sanctity of my marriage by loving my wife the best way I know how. That includes not coveting other women, keeping strong and open communication with my wife, spending quality time with her, and being the best dad I can be to our son. Oh, and prayer, too.
But not the kind endorsed by the government… because, you know, the government took away prayer from us.
Here’s the video I stole from a friend on Facebook that inspired this article. Now handing the mic to Julie Borowski: