Posts Tagged ‘ Matchbox Twenty ’

3 Songs About Insanity This Dad Can Relate To

Tuesday, December 27th, 2011

13 months.

There are countless songs which lightly use the word “crazy” as an exaggeration of how a person feels. But there are remarkably less songs out there where the singer is actually insane or headed in that direction. Today, I want to celebrate three of those songs.

Why? Because now that I’m 13 months into raising a kid, I’m finding more and more that I’m less and less of who I used to be. I’m becoming this much more mature and serious guy who has flashbacks of myself back when I was a “normal guy,” before I became a dad.

All this continual changing in my life, along with the constant need for on-the-spot decision-making has led me to become an arguably less likeable guy, in some ways. Maybe I’m not as fun as I used to be- I don’t know.

I’ve been forced to morph into this person who knows that at any minute his son’s daycare could call, saying his son has a fever. That means, I have to miss work (a commission-based sales job) to pick him up though he’s not even sick; he sometimes just gets a fever as he’s teething.

Yeah, that sort of makes me a little bit of a zombie; constantly on but never really able to focus on real life. Then again, having to miss work because your son has a fever is more “real life” than working a necessary job.

It’s such a trying balance in life. Seriously, I used to be normal. I used to not have to worry about stuff. But this is parenthood and this is my version of normal now.

Here are three songs that I can relate to, now more than ever:

1. “Unwell” by Matchbox Twenty. I have to keep reminding myself that I’m not actually crazy; this song helps.

“It makes me think there must be something wrong
With me
Out of all the hours thinking
I’ve lost my mind
I’m not crazy, I’m just a little unwell
I know, right now you can’t tell”

2. “Who Can It Be Now?” by Men At Work. Here’s another denial at my lack of sanity; or at least my perception of it.

“I’ll be trapped, and here I’ll have to stay.
I’ve done no harm, I keep to myself;
There’s nothing wrong with my state of mental health.
I like it here with my childhood friend;
Here they come, those feelings again!”

3. “I’m Shakin’” by Rooney. For the fact that this song asks the question, “What is normal?” makes me feel good. After all, asking that exact question happens a lot in parenting.

“I’ve forgotten what it feels like to feel normal
To be normal
I’ve forgotten what food tastes like
What is normal?”

Unexpected Bonus!

Speaking of being unwell, one lucky family will win a copy of the brand new children’s book, Cougar Cub Tales: The Sneezy Wheezy Day. When a young cougar cub gets sick, he and his sister seek out the advice of well-meaning jungle friends. But could it be that the faithful companionship of his sister is the remedy for the cub’s sneezing and wheezing? I’m sure not telling…

I’ve been asking readers to mail me their holiday cards for giveaways like this. So today, I had Jack pick a winner. And the winner is… featured on The Dadabase Facebook page. Just look for the video “Sneezy Wheezy” to see if your family is the winner of this giveaway.



Add a Comment

My Best Friend is a Girl

Wednesday, July 27th, 2011

Eight months.

We have been told more than a few times that we look like brother and sister.  Nope, we’re best friends. Oh yeah, and we happen to be married, too.

(Pictured right: St. Patrick’s Day 2007- We had been dating for about a month.)

Having spent my teenage years during The Nineties, the music I will always truly love the most is from the grunge and alternative era. In fact, I proudly continue to buy the new albums of those same bands that are still around like Counting Crows, Live, Matchbox Twenty (Rob Thomas), and Third Eye Blind.  And that is why I continue to remain a huge fan of Weezer. For many, if Weezer was ever relevant in any way, it was in 1995 with their hit “Buddy Holly.”

But as long as each year Weezer releases yet another self-titled or bizarrely named new album, I will surely be digging it. Yesterday in the car I was listening to their song “My Best Friend,” which never really stood out to me before.  But as I listened to the lyrics, I thought of my wife:

“You are such a blessing and I won’t be messing with the one thing that brings light to all of my darkness. You’re my best friend and I love you… I’m here right beside you. I will never leave you.”

And it hit me: My wife really is my best friend!

But it’s not simply a romanticized idea. In fact, the thing that actually helps me to truly grasp the concept of my wife being my best friend is by removing any romantic aspects from our relationship. It’s a struggle, but if for a moment, I view my wife and myself not as a woman and man, but instead just two souls, I can catch a glimpse of us how we are best friends in addition to being married and in love.

Of course, both of us do have our close, same-gendered friends that we talk to.  And that’s very important. But as a married couple, we refuse to let much time go by if we sense that the other is “in a moment” where they need some empathy or direction. As I always say, we strongly value communication in our marriage.

Ultimately, being best friends in a marriage often means transcending the romantic elements of the relationship. Sure, it still includes and depends on those necessary romantic elements, but it’s so much more than being in love.

I guess for me, the only way I could have ever been married was to know that I had found and was marrying my best friend.  And that’s exactly what happened to me.

Our Timeline:

October 5th, 2006: we met for the first time at a taping of CMT Crossroads

February 5th, 2007: our first date at a John Mayer concert

January 14th, 2008: I proposed

July 5th, 2008: our wedding day

November 16th, 2010: our son was born

All pictures with the “JHP” logo were taken by Joe Hendricks Photography:



Add a Comment