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Wednesday, June 11th, 2014
3 years, 6 months.
Yesterday on my business road trip from Franklin, TN to Murray, KY, I was a passenger for a total round trip of over 5 hours.
Seriously, I was in culture shock.
Please understand why…
Since you were born 3 and a half years ago, I have been driving you to and from school every single day. On the weekends, I drive the both you and Mommy around.
For all our road trips, to Louisville, KY, to Atlanta, GA, to my hometown in Fort Payne, AL, it’s me that’s driving; I’m never the passenger.
It’s even rare for me to be driving in a car by myself. There’s always someone for me to entertain and/or take care of.
So for me to be a passenger for over 5 hours yesterday, just sitting in the back seat… man, it was weird!
I read for a little while, I texted Mommy, I texted my friend Jarred, I took a little nap; but ultimately, the experience somehow made me feel lazy- like I was evading my role.
It’s just that I am wired to be the driver, the navigator, the one who is ultimately in charge.
I am wired for responsibility. But as a passenger in a vehicle, it felt sort of wrong; like how in my letter to you yesterday I explained that it felt wrong not seeing you all day long.
This morning, I drove you to school as usual. It was as if everything were back to normal.
I answered your questions about why dark clouds mean it’s probably going to rain and explained how the sun dries up the rain once the sun comes back out again.
As I drove you, I taught you. That’s what I do. That’s part of the dynamics of our father-son relationship.
What I don’t do is just watch the telephone poles go by as a classic 90s hit comes on the radio.
We can drive it home, with one headlight…
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Tuesday, June 10th, 2014
3 years, 6 months.
For me, this was a weird day. I had to leave early this morning for a business trip in Kentucky.
So instead of taking you to and from school, I was across the state line. By the time I got home, you were already asleep.
My only interaction with you was saying goodbye to you at the front door.
While that may not seem like such a big deal, it is for me.
Today just felt wrong without you.
I feel kind of sad. I feel kind of wrong. I mean, I had to go for work- so I did what I was supposed to.
And I know I’ll see you in a few hours when we both wake up. But seriously, not seeing you for a day is just plain odd.
My day went great. It was very productive. I got a whole lot done. But I was aware the whole time that something was missing- it was you.
Since you’re only 3 and a half and are obviously way too young for a cell phone, it’s not like I could text you to say I miss you or even call you to a donkey noise to make you laugh.
So I settled for Mommy promising me that she would tell you good night from me as she put you to bed.
It only makes sense that if research shows that kids make men happy, as the infographic below explains, that I would be less happy when I’m not around you for a day.
I believe it. I have been psychologically conditioned to associate feeling happy and fulfilled with having interaction with you.
Without that, I’m like an actor on stage who suddenly forgot his lines. I’m staring into the blinding spotlight, trying to find you in the audience.
Infographic courtesy of Happify:
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Sunday, July 7th, 2013
2 years, 7 months.
You have now officially been to the Midwest!
While visiting the zoo in Louisville, Kentucky, our hotel was actually right across the Ohio River, in Jeffersonville, Indiana.
Of course, technically, Louisville is, in my opinion, half Southern and half Midwestern, as the confusing pronunciation of its name exemplifies.
It’s either the most northern Southern city or the most southern Northern city of America… I don’t think anyone really knows for sure.
Either way, I love the whole Louisville area (including the Indiana side) because it all reminds me so much of Nashville.
So I had mentioned a few days ago how Mommy and I had been hyping you up for the exciting fold-out couch you would be sleeping on in the hotel.
Your “big boy bed,” as I kept referring to it.
Yeah, well, guess who ended up sleeping in your big boy bed…
That’s right; the biggest boy in our family of three… Daddy.
All I remember is you laying down with me on the fold-out couch watching a horse race on TV, then waking up 7 hours later to find out you and Mommy got to sleep in the real bed without me.
I didn’t mind…
Hey, I got 7 hours of sound sleep; that’s a pretty big deal for me, especially after driving 3 hours at night in the rain with you refusing to fall asleep in the car.
As you can see from these pictures, which sort of remind me of a 1990′s mosh pit at a grunge concert, you had a good time jumping on the bed, like those monkeys we sing about sometimes.
Fortunately, despite all your contorting, you never fell off and bumped your head or injured yourself in anyway.
This was not only your first Midwestern road trip, but it was also your first hotel experience.
I had hoped you’d like the fun fold-out couch, but I’ll settle for getting a full night’s rest out of it myself, as well as getting to watch you the next morning go crazy jumping around on the bed that I was supposed to get to sleep on.
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