Posts Tagged ‘ depression ’

Calling All Helicopter Parents… Tell Me Your Story!

Friday, October 19th, 2012

23 months.

If you are a helicopter parent, think you might be one, or have been recently called one by someone you know, tell me about it.

Do you “hover over” your child? Are you considered to be “over-involved” in your child’s life?

I’m curious and I want to explain why.

Recently I finished a 3 part series on trying to figure out if I was a helicopter parent. (I know now that I’m not.)

However, to come to that conclusion, I compared myself to extreme stereotypes of what I imagine(d) a helicopter parent to be.

While that may have been effective in helping me reach the conclusion of my self-analysis, it still leaves things quite blurry on what a real helicopter parent is actually like.

By gathering stories from readers, I want to be able to present a collective image of a true helicopter parent.

I want to hear which of your behaviors cause you to be labeled as one.

Allow me to give my grandiose stereotype of a helicopter parent so that my preconceived ideas can be proven wrong:

A true helicopter parent believes the “cry it method” is evil and therefore their child rarely sleeps in their own bed, up until the child’s preteen years. The child is given prescription drugs as early as preschool to help them with ADHD and/or depression, as the child never really learns to cope with their own emotions.

Years later, the child has trouble finding their classes in high school and even college, calling their parents for help. Similarly, the child is still completely dependent on their parents, well into their 20′s, for laundry and cooked meals.

Ultimately, the child never really learns to stand up for themselves or believe in themselves.

They never learn individuality, because their concept of it is based completely on how their parents perceive them.

By the time they reach adulthood, all the “babying” their parents have done has preserved them in a perpetual state of “what am I supposed to do?”

Now is your chance to enlighten me, as well as the rest of us, who don’t understand your parenting style. Now is your chance to defend your proud stance as a helicopter parent. Set the record straight by overwriting the stereotype I just shared.

Send me an email. Tweet me. Contact me on The Dadabase Facebook page.

All of those things are super easy to do, just by clicking on the appropriate icon on the right side of the screen, underneath “Follow Nick Shell.”

Or just simply leave a comment below.

Okay, go…

 

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Dadvice #8: Too Young To Medicate ADHD And Bipolar Disorder?

Monday, April 2nd, 2012

16 months.

Yesterday for April Fool’s Day, I wrote a satire on putting kids on calorie counting diets, forcing them to compete in beauty pageants, and medicating them for ADHD and bipolar disorder.

Back in 2002 while in college, I was a substitute teacher. I remember how for several Kindergartners, I had to make sure they took their medicine for ADHD. I didn’t agree with what I was doing, but I wasn’t their parent; nor was I even their real teacher.

Recently I pitched this question to everyone on Facebook and Twitter:

“How young is too young to medicate a child for ADHD and/or bipolar disorder?”

Very few people were willing to answer this question, but those who did A) are school teachers and B) replied that children shouldn’t be medicated for those things at all.

I think in our culture it has become taboo to talk about this subject openly because so many adults are on some kind of prescription for depression. To speak against medicating any person for a psychiatric disorder is a sure fire way to offend plenty of people in your social network of friends, family, and random people on Facebook you pretend to remember from college.

But I’m not talking about adults being treated for psychiatric disorders, I’m wanting to have an open discussion about kids being medically treated for these things.

The question I am asking is how young is too young for a child to be treated for ADHD and bipolar disorder?

See, I am trying to find out how America truly feels about this issue; whether you support it, oppose it, or are confused by it.

(I’m not talking about Autism, by the way.)

I should point out why I keep relating ADHD and bipolar disorder as if they are related. That’s because, according to the documentary Frontline: The Medicated Child (available on Netflix streaming, pbs.org, and YouTube), of all the children who are diagnosed with ADHD, 23% of them also are diagnosed as bipolar.

As of 2008 when the documentary was made, there were over 6 million kids being treated for ADHD and depression. I can’t imagine that number has gotten any lower since then.

See the slippery slope? Get medicated for ADHD at age 6 and work your way up to depression medication by the time you’re 10 years old.

It’s evidently unethical and socially unacceptable to test out psychiatric drugs on children before the drugs go out on the market, so children are given the same medication that are given to adults.

Either way, kids become the Guinea pigs for these drugs.

So how are children diagnosed for these psychiatric disorders anyway? According to Frontline: The Medicated Child, it really just comes down to a doctor’s simple analysis:

The key behaviors of ADHD sufferers are inattention, hyperactivity, and impulsiveness.

And for bipolar disorder: euphoria or irritability, grandiose ideas, excessive talking, racing thoughts, and unusual energy.

I guess the question is, how is every kid in America not a sufferer of ADHD or bipolar disorder? More importantly, how is my 16 month-old toddler not the poster child for these psychiatric disorders?

Obviously, I’m leaving myself open for someone to say, “You don’t know what it’s like to raise a child with ADHD and/or depression…”.

That’s right. I don’t and I won’t.

Because I’m drawing the behavioral boundaries for him; even now. He can’t even speak a full sentence yet, but he is already very aware of what he can and can not do.

As he tests my limits, he is not given empty threats; instead he actually sees a follow-through with instant consequences.

I do the main behavioral training in my house for my kid. No thanks to a doctor; no thanks to medicine.

Yes, that’s right: I said “behavioral training.” Children need to be properly trained; not treated.

 

 

 

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