Happy 30th Birthday to My Wife!

Eight months.

There have been more than a few people who were surprised when they learned that I am not married to a girl in her early 20′s; instead I am only three months older than she is. Today, my wife Jill turns 30 years old.

We were both born in 1981, graduated high school in 1999, and had our first child in 2010. Not only is my wife my best friend, but we have experienced the same amount of living. In 2007 when we started dating, our timelines became one as we have shared our lives together ever since.

For our first dance at our wedding reception in 2008, we actually had two songs played back to back: “Everything” by Michael Buble was a more natural, understandable selection, which represented our “normal” sides.  But we felt the need to also include a song that represented our mutual quirkiness, too.  So we chose the weirdly beautiful, “The Luckiest” by Ben Folds.

In “The Luckiest,” Ben Folds explores the idea of the importance of a shared timeline, answering the idea of what life would be like had the love of his life not been born in the right year:

“What if I’d been born fifty years before you
In a house on a street where you lived?
Maybe I’d be outside as you passed on your bike
Would I know?”

I imagine the statistical chances of the two of us being born in the same basic era of time, as opposed to decades or centuries apart. Instead, we were born in the same year and did find each other.

Jill and I have this plan to die naturally in our sleep while holding hands when we are 80 years old.  Sure, we realize we have zero control over the previous sentence ever becoming true, but it’s how we’d like to think our shared love comes to an earthly end.

Speaking of, “The Luckiest” also addresses this issue:

“Next door there’s an old man who lived to his nineties
And one day passed away in his sleep.
And his wife; she stayed for a couple of days
And passed away.
I’m sorry, I know that’s a strange way to tell you that I know we belong.”

The two of us are normal enough to play Michael Buble at our wedding reception for our first dance, but we’re also off-beat enough to play a Ben Folds song that talks about the “luckiness” of being born in the same time era, as well as, dying near the same time in old age.

I’m aware of my natural ability to be weird and abstract.  But somehow that worked for me and my wife chose to spend her life with me.  To quote Ben Folds one last time:

“I love you more than I have ever found a way to say to you… I am the luckiest.”

Happy Birthday Jill!

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  1. by Karen Barnes

    On August 11, 2011 at 10:45 am

    Too cute! Love it! Happy Birthday Jill!

  2. by Joanne

    On August 11, 2011 at 11:54 am

    Enjoyed your article and the lovely tribute to your love. You truly are lucky…no, more than that–blessed with a special gift!!

  3. by Karen

    On August 11, 2011 at 5:59 pm

    Happy birthday, Jill!

    I got goosebumps reading this. Not only was “the Luckiest” almost our wedding song (we eventually just put it on the wedding mix and used Little Big Town’s “Bring it on Home”), but our lives have run pretty parallel. I was born in 81, graduated in ’99. My husband and I both graduated college in 2003, started dating in ’07, married in ’09 and had our first child in October of 2010. Good timeline!! :)

  4. by Nick Shell

    On August 11, 2011 at 8:46 pm

    Karen, that is so cool! You, of all people, can definitely relate to us :)

  5. by Nick Shell

    On August 11, 2011 at 8:47 pm

    Joanne, thank you so much :)

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