The Kind Of Old Man I’m Wanting To Become

2 years, 9 months.

Dear Jack,

I’ve learned in life that it’s dangerous to assume I’m right, about anything, because it seems that the people who are often wrong are typically convinced they are always right.

Over the past couple years especially, since you’ve been around, I’ve mellowed out, in a good way.

It’s true that becoming a parent makes you a better, stronger, less selfish, more mature person.

Ultimately, it comes down to reminding myself to put you and Mommy before myself, as I’ve mentioned before.

That requires me to be constantly open-minded and always assuming that my own ego could be slowing down the family train. (Or carousel, as the picture implies.)

I believe those requirements will help make me the old man I’m planning to become.

Yes, I know, I’m only 32.

But I want to be very deliberate about the future old man version of me.

After all, I do plan to live a long life, keeping up with you and Mommy.

When I’m old, no matter how old I get, until I eventually (and hopefully) just die in my sleep at the end of a good long life, I want to be a man who others still find refreshing, entertaining, giving, optimistic, and yes, open-minded.

In other words, I don’t want to be stuck in my ways, muttering about the good ole days and complaining about how the younger generations are messing everything up.

I don’t want to wind up a cliche. And the stereotype of a crotchety old man is one that a lot of people are familiar with.

That’s why, now, in the past (assuming you are reading this many years from now) I want to be living with the right mindset; one that will carry on into the next 50 years or so.

This infographic does a great job on summing it up. I can see who I used to be (having the scarcity mindset) compared to who I am becoming (adopting the abundance consciousness).

As I read through the attributes of both, it makes me think about a Jason Mraz song called  ”Live High.”

Here’s an excerpt:

“I try to picture the man to always have an open hand
See him as a giving tree, see him as matter
Matter of fact he’s not a beast
No, not the devil either, always a good deed doer
Well, it’s laughter that we’re makin’ after all

The call of the wild is still in order nationwide
In the order of the primates all our politics are too late
Oh my, the congregation in my mind
Is an assembly selling gratitude and practicing their lovin’ for you”

Son, I’m sorry if this all seems a bit random today. If nothing else, know that being your dad means there’s a lot of psychological stuff I’m forced to reckon with. I am now far from the 2010 version of myself, from before you were born.

I can’t be your dad and not be changed by the process. For better or worse. I choose better.





Infographic credit: Chris Record.

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